the Christian Business Guy blog

You can be close to God

2011-07-02T16:01:00.000-05:00

I recently heard something a family friend's High School daughter said when she was younger. She said, "Mom, I want to be close to God like Moses". I love that and it has stayed with me. I've often thought about that statement and its inspiring. There is no reason why any of us cannot be as close to God as the Biblical greats - or as the strongest Christian we know of.

If you and I have a desire to be that close to God- its a good goal. This is a matter to discuss with the Lord. Go talk with God about this and express the desire that you want to be especially close to Him. Then start creating a lifestyle that involves prayer, Bible reading, meditating on the Lord, and living in a pure way. Seek the Lord. Getting close to God is not an overnight thing- but if we seek the Lord diligently it will happen.

What an inspiring young girl- may we all seek the Lord like that.

Let's GO God!

Pray within your circle of influence

2011-07-01T07:49:00.000-05:00

Something I have discovered is that I have a circle of people which includes family, friends, co-workers, and neighbors. This is a pretty big circle of people. I've had the idea floating around in my head lately to pray for the people within this circle of influence.

I thought I would share that idea here because its been a neat experience to gradually take this on. The Lord has put a certain group of people in our lives and we can have a profound impact on their salvation, their challenges, and their spiritual growth through the power of God pointed at them by prayer.

Quick additional thought on this- when we pray for others and invest our time in this way it is not as if that prayer time is not also helping us. By inviting the Lord into our time, our thoughts, and our lives through a time of prayer- and through unselfishly praying for others - He will also help, teach, empower, and bless us.

Let's GO God!

Treasure #7 "Special prayer focus days"

2011-06-30T10:31:00.000-05:00

One of the neat things I have been doing for a few years which I have reinvigorated recently is praying for a few minutes in my car during my lunchtime at work. It's neat having a special prayer focus for each day. I like to build regular habits intentionally and follow them.

Here are my special prayer focuses for each day:

Monday - it's my business meeting with God and I pray for my job and my Web project. It's remarkable what has happened some Mondays as a result of this.

Tuesday - not assigned right now.

Wednesday - this is a day of intercession and praying for other people, world issues, and nations who need Christ.

Thursday - this is a day I pray for my family with a special focus on my kids and my wife.

Friday - not assigned right now.

I hope this plan inspires you to have special prayer focus days!

Let's GO God!

Relevant?

2011-06-29T07:56:00.000-05:00

In the Christian world, in America at least, we have this idea that is spoken about from time to time about being "relevant". If you are seeking God a lot, limiting your television watching, talking about God a lot, or putting your kids in a Christian school, you might cause a fellow-Believer to mention that its important to be "relevant" to the world.

By "relevant" the Believer is saying we don't want to seem too-different or "weird" because then non-Believers will not be able to relate to us and they might be turned off from coming to Christ.

However the interesting thing about this is I have never heard a person who is seeking God daily and trying to live a holy life talk about the need to be relevant. I have only heard the phrase "relevant" used in an attempt to pull someone back who is seeking the Lord. I think what happens is a person trying to seek the Lord presents a challenge to Believers around them. The God seeker with their lifestyle encourages, exhorts, and strongly urges other Believers to become a God seeker. I believe that the enemy of our souls has invented this American Christian phrase and idea of "relevance" in order to tame radical God-seekers and marginalize them.

We have to challenge the things we think and not just go along with every thought or idea that is in the culture- even in the Christian culture. It is both unwise and spineless to walk forward in a lifestyle of believing every clever phrase or idea that is presented to us. This idea of "relevance" is one that should be challenged for example.

Think about it- do we have people who are so godly and so full of prayer that no one relates to them? Who in the world do you know who spends so much time with God, and lives such a pure life, that no one understands or relates to them? Have you ever met such a person? I have never met such a person- I'd love to meet such a person actually. The fact is the enemy tries to convince Believers about this idea of being "relevant" by pointing-out a few so-called Christians who are actually idiots. The enemy will often produce false evidence to back-up his lies and will use a seed of truth and build an entire false idea out of it.

Certainly we see odd television evangelists, anger-filled "Christian screamers", and other examples in life of so-called "Christians" that embarrass us. Certainly these people are not relevant or helpful to anyone. However, those examples of strange behavior have nothing to do with the regular man or woman of God who is simply trying to live a pure life, limit media choices, educate their children to serve God, and live a life of intense prayer. So you see the enemy at work attempting to link sober-minded radical God-seekers to the worst examples in order to discredit them.

Satan will always try to tame Believers. He is not concerned about the busy, distracted, television-addicted, and zero prayer life Christian. What the enemy is worried about- and builds up arguments against- are those who really put God first and seek Him.

The best way to defeat a lie is to bring forth the truth. So, lets see what God says. Deuteronomy 6:4-6 says, "Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one! You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength." That passage sounds pretty radical to me- in fact there is nowhere in the Bible, which is the Christian's handbook, where there is any concern about being relevant. This whole idea is an exaggeration and a lie. In fact the Apostle Paul in 1 Corinthians 2:15 says, "But he who is spiritual judges all things, yet he himself is rightly judged by no one." This is saying the person who is spiritual is able to make good and accurate judgments about any area of life. I have seen this in practice. I find that sober-minded, God-seeking Believers who have a desire to love one another and do the right thing often make wise decisions in life.

I encourage you then to BE RELEVANT - by being a radical Christ-follower and seeker of God.

Let's GO God!

Treasure #6 - "You can trust me to God"

2011-06-28T07:52:00.000-05:00

When I was first married almost 13 years ago- I was a mess (still am in many ways). I wrestled with lust, immorality, jealousy, insecurity, incredible sensitivity, unforgiveness, and more. However, when I got married I made the decision to work toward coming back to the Lord, purifying my life, and seeking Him. He had been leading me back to Himself for some time and He gave me the idea that the time of marriage was a really good time of life to make that final commitment- so I did.

I remember at the 1-year mark my wife and I had a big argument. In the aftermath of the argument I remember making a statement to my wife, "You can trust me to God. As long as I keep coming to Him and seeking Him - He will make the changes that are necessary in me." That was a principal that was new to me at the time but it has become a treasure to my family and my marriage. I have continued to seek the Lord and put Him first and He has gradually healed me, taught me, and helped me to grow in Him- and deal with some of the baggage I brought into the marriage.

My wife has seen me over-react to things, be too-easily hurt by things, be strangled by jealousy, and fight lust - but I keep telling her that if I will simply keep coming to God He will set me free. This principle continues to prove-out in the real world and God has dealt with many of those things in me.

There is a neat scripture that sort of talks about this whole idea found in 1st Peter 2:2-4 "as newborn babes, desire the pure milk of the word, that you may grow thereby, if indeed you have tasted that the Lord is gracious. Coming to Him as to a living stone, rejected indeed by men, but chosen by God and precious, you also, as living stones, are being built up a spiritual house, a holy priesthood...."

I like how it says that as we come to him we are built into what God intends for us- so our job is to keep coming to him and he is the builder and shaper.

Let's GO God!

Scripture provided by Biblegateway.com, scripture was in the New King James Version which is copyrighted by Thomas Nelson.

Put God First Test - Follow up Report

2011-06-26T22:18:00.000-05:00

I did a 30-day "Put God First Test" that ended 3 weeks ago today. I essentially went to bed by 10:45 or so each day to wake-up by 6:15 or so and pray and spend time with God before work. Prior to this I would have worked on my job until 11, 12, or 1am - I was working like crazy trying to be proactive for my job but I ended up with an idol in my heart- my job.

I wanted to give an update report 3 weeks after the "Put God First Test" ended. First of all I have continued to go to bed at a reasonable time and get up to spend time with the Lord each morning- I really have a strong habit of this now.

Spending time with the Lord has definitely helped me grow in the Lord and prioritize my time. When you have to plan your whole day around getting to bed so you can wake up to pray- you think about time management more - so that's been helpful.

The big thing I want to mention is this: the reason I was working so hard late into the night was to be proactive with my job, but it really wasn't working very well. I was getting exhausted and I wasn't getting that much proactive work done. However NOW I am finding I am getting a lot of proactive things done for work. In fact, last week I had luxury amounts of time to get proactive things done- I drank it like water and worked on more than a couple of things that will impact my company and all of our sales team for a long time to come. I even submitted a product idea last week.

My conclusion is this- I'll take spending time with God and trust Him to multiply and bless me vs. working myself to death and ignoring God. God has shown Himself faithful, powerful... and even proactive.

Let's Go God!

Oddities and Opposites

2011-06-25T23:16:00.001-05:00

One of the striking things about reading G.K. Chesterton's book "Orthodoxy" is how many times he says the truth of some matter is precisely the opposite of how the secular world views it.

He will take a statement made by some unbeliever and show how things are actually the opposite from the way the person has described them.

I have found an interesting pattern in life in that the truth has this odd quality of being backward from what you might expect.

Here are some examples that I find interesting:
1.) In Christianity if you gain everything you really lose everything.
2.) A sinless man died for sinners.
3.) God is 3 and 1 at the same time.
4.) To be exalted you have to be humbled.
5.) If you give to people who can't pay you back- you will increase.
6.) 90% of your income is worth more than 100%.
7.) God chooses the weak and foolish to overcome the strong and wise.
8.) God will leave 99 sheep to save 1.
9.) You must die to live.
10.) The existence of God is so obvious from the intricate design found in nature - yet he is invisible.

Treasure #5 - "Attempt great things for God"

2011-06-24T07:29:00.000-05:00

I have a phrase I always use at the end of my blog posts which is, "Let's Go God!" The background behind this is, for some time now, I've said that quite often when walking in to my office at work - particularly after prayer. Its a reminder to me that I've dedicated my life, including my business life, to God and its an outward statement to God that I remember I've put him first in my life and in prayer- so I actively expect and look for his help in my business. I put this at the end of my blog posts - because I blog in the morning usually and I am heading to work.

The phrase "Let's Go God" is a good theme for my business life. In all areas of my life, but certainly in my business life, I work to put God first in my time, my thoughts, my finances, and my priorities. (this doesn't mean I'm a good guy - I'm weak, foolish, lack experience, and have a very sinful past) Since I do put God first it helps me to trust Him with any circumstances that arise.

I remember a certain sales deal that was very large - and I believe it was the last day of the quarter. The manager who was working on finalizing the deal was not responding- this is a key problem in sales. We were down to the wire with no time left in the quarter and we really needed this deal as a group. Because God is my business partner sometimes I literally attempt things that are impossible in order to give God an opportunity to show up with a miracle. In the case of this deal I tried something a little crazy and quite risky in order to give God the chance to help me. I did some research on the Internet and found out who one of our champion's top executives was. I reached out to this person directly and let them know all about this deal and the consequences of the deal terms if we did not get it that day.

This executive who was blind-sided about this deal and the potential consequences got our main contact in a little bit of trouble and "stirred the pot" FAST. I got in trouble with our main contact, with another part of our sales organization, and I was called on the carpet by an internal executive at my company. This was not a small matter- but WE GOT THE DEAL. Everyone had to admit that it was very gutsy and effective even though it caused some back-lash. Through this I got to see another example of the idea of "attempting great things for God" - and attempting things BECAUSE they are impossible for the very reason that I trust in God.

I say God is my business partner but if its just words and nothing people can ever see then it won't be very useful except to me privately. The great thing about being in a business partnership with God is you can try hard things, prayerfully, asking God for help, and then trust Him to help you. It doesn't mean you will win every single deal but you'll win many- and God WILL do what other people think is impossible.

Put God first, cover your life in prayer, pray specifically - and attempt great things for God. You will have a testimony of God's help- and will be a lighthouse wherever you are.

Let's GO God!

Treasure #4 - "An undivided heart"

2011-06-23T07:33:00.000-05:00

When you seek the Lord and walk with Him he will begin to show and teach you things. These will be treasures to you all of your life. These treasures will be more precious to you than worldly things and they will connect you through memories and experiences in special ways to the Lord. They are something shared just between you and the Lord and they enrich your relationship with Him. You will also be able to share your treasures with others to encourage them.

The treasure I want to share with you today is found in the Book of Psalms chapter 86, verse 11- the second half of the verse, here it is in the NIV:
"..give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name."

This verse spoke to me several years ago and became one of my life's prayers. It taught me to actually pray for my own heart. I want to know the Lord but its so easy to have things get between us and the Lord- this verse taught me a way of asking the Lord for help to ensure he had all of my heart. I knew I had fallen away from the Lord before and knew what I wanted in life was to know God- this verse showed me I can pray for help to stay strong in the Lord. I was inspired from this verse to pray for an undivided heart and it has meant a lot to me for the last few years.

As you seek the Lord and put God first - he'll share treasures with you that will enrich your relationship with Him and allow you to bless others.

Let's GO God!

A letter to the discouraged

2011-06-22T07:40:00.001-05:00

This is a "letter" I want to write to someone who is discouraged.

You have worked so hard to do the right thing. You have bent and not broken. You have not compromised and have not given up- and now you are discouraged. Your heart is broken and you think your life is out of control- but its not. You are too shattered right now to be able to believe or receive these words but later you will see that God's plans are not hindered by this delay. God is never hindered by circumstances. The enemy is making a push like he always does but he will not prevail. God will bring you good through this. "Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go."(Joshua 1:9, NKJV)

Sometimes we all get discouraged. The enemy of our souls tries to stifle our spiritual growth, the love we express to others, our love for God, and our desire to do the right thing. Unfortunately human beings are often used by the enemy- he manipulates them to bring hurt. The enemy tries to wound us in areas of our deepest fears, doubts, and past pains. The enemy seeks to discourage us and tempt us to give up. We will all go through times of discouragement and this is normal.

It is difficult to remember when you are walking through the valley of the shadow of death and cannot see a way out that the Lord is with you. I just want you to know that the Lord is close to you right now. If there is any way you can spend 20 minutes with him in private and just sit with him it would be of great help to you. Picture yourself leaning against your Heavenly Father's chest and sit silently. Sometimes when we are sad, wounded, discouraged, or hopeless the best thing to do is just sit with the Lord.

I also want you to know about a Psalm that is precious to me when I go through times of hurt or brokenness. Its Psalm 34:18 and it says, "The LORD is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves such as have a contrite spirit."(NKJV) Another version says, "The LORD is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed."(NLT) It is so encouraging and I've found it to be so true that the Lord draws close to us when we are hurting. Take the time to be with Him right now and allow his presence to comfort you, heal you, and give you hope.

I also want you to know that the Lord will not leave you forever in the situation you are in. Keep seeking him, stay faithful, and allow him time to work in your circumstances- trust him beyond what you can see with your eyes and understand with your mind. Our perception is so limited. This is why its important to read the Bible so that we can learn truths that are above and beyond what we can see, feel, or understand.

In fact, we can see in this very same Psalm in the verses directly after the one that says God is close to the brokenhearted, that God starts off talking about encouragement- but then goes right into the SOLUTION he will bring as we continue to walk faithfully before Him. Look at this:

19 Many are the afflictions of the righteous,
         But the LORD delivers him out of them all.
20 He guards all his bones;
         Not one of them is broken.
21 Evil shall slay the wicked,
         And those who hate the righteous shall be condemned.
22 The LORD redeems the soul of His servants,
         And none of those who trust in Him shall be condemned.(NKJV)

So, he wants you to be encouraged this day and know that He is close to you when life shatters you - but He also wants you to see the future as you can see outlined in verses 19-22 above. There is comfort in the Lord- but there is also future deliverance you will be able to see with your eyes and understand with your mind.

Let His love comfort you now- He brought you to see this blog post- He wanted you to be encouraged but He also wanted you to see that in the future you will understand... you were RIGHT to trust in Him.

Let's GO God!

(Scriptures provided by www.BibleGateway.com and www.Biblos.com, New King James Version of the Bible is copyrighted by Thomas Nelson and the New Living Translation is copyrighted by Tyndale House publishing)

Treasure #3 - "Prayer keeps rolling on..."

2011-06-21T07:46:00.001-05:00

There is a young person I am aware of who, in the past several years, has gone through some seasons of difficulty. My family and I have prayed for this young person and I've even prayed+fasted at least once, maybe twice. Except for a rare quick prayer we have not prayed for them in an intense way for some time now.

Recently I spoke with this young person and learned that they have quietly, deeply, and sincerely re-dedicated their life to the Lord! I also learned the Lord has spoken to them in some fairly profound ways. I was stunned by the warmth,wisdom, compassion, and spirituality of this young person and TOTALLY encouraged!

While I spoke to them the Lord opened my eyes to the fact that my prayers were still working in this young person's life even years later- even though I had not prayed for them lately. The Lord clearly showed me as I spoke to them that he continued to answer the prayers and requests I had made- long after I had prayed them.

I was very proud of this young person, encouraged by their progress, and stunned by the ongoing answers to my prayers and intercession. I thought about this situation and let it simmer on the back-burner in my mind...until the next day...

When I went to work the next day (this all happened very recently) I received an update from a Christian friend of mine about their brother-in-law (whom I will call "DM") whom we had both prayed for- probably for a year now. DM had severe health issues, family challenges, financial challenges, and lost his job. He was also suffering from severe depression. My work friend and I had tag-team prayed for DM through many challenging circumstances and the update I received on this day was that DM was doing better physically, his family life is more stable, and he is in a stronger place emotionally. Other than some quick occasional prayers in the past couple of weeks I had not intensely prayed for DM for a couple of weeks- since the last difficult crisis he had gone through. As I was standing there hearing the update on DM's solid progress the Lord opened my eyes yet again to show me that prayers offered on DM's behalf some time ago continued to roll on in his life.

In my entire life I have never heard, thought, or known that prayers continue to roll on and have an effective work long after you pray them- and here I was hearing a second story in two days about the ongoing effects of prayer. Stunning. STUNNING. It was amazing that the Lord had first of all given me in two days, two stories of people who benefitted from my prayers in a much more lasting way than I could have imagined. It was also amazing that the Lord opened my eyes to the lesson to tie the two stories together.

WHAT an encouraging lesson- I am so thankful. How powerful and full of faith I will be able to come near to the throne of God to pray for a situation, a nation, or a person! This is a super new thing for me so I don't have many additional thoughts about it- just a couple of quick conclusions:

1.) When we pray- it has a LASTING impact long after we pray.
2.) Another reason the prayers have a lasting impact like this is because we aren't praying to a slot machine but to a PERSONAL God who cares about the situation more than we do, understands it better than we do, and is more faithful than we can imagine!

I love you God - help us all to run with the lesson that you are faithful to answer prayers even years after we've prayed them!

Let's GO God!

Treasure #2 - Weakness or Attack?

2011-06-20T07:58:00.001-05:00

I have found that people, including myself, deal with the same or similar types of things. This can be bad habits, sins, tendencies, etc.

Scripture says, our enemy the Devil prowls around seeking someone to devour. When he is seeking someone to destroy he oftentimes tries to manipulate and trick in an area we have fallen in the past. Its much easier for the enemy to take advantage of a known weakness- instead of trying to create a new one. He also tries to take advantage of sin areas our immediate family has wrestled with- this is called "generational iniquity".

So, as we are dealing with sins, weaknesses, insecurities, fears, and other struggles its important to note that the enemy also jumps on to those situations. He will introduce additional thoughts of false guilt, condemnation, shame, embarrassment, fear, jealousy, envy, or lust into our minds.

Its difficult to recognize the enemy is involved in a situation. Two days ago you may have read my rather shocking blog post about how worried and down I was. I only realized after a couple of hours into it and after speaking with my wife that the enemy was stirring up my mind with all kinds of imaginations and making what was truly a difficult night- even worse. Its hard to realize the enemy is attacking you because the thoughts he introduces into your mind are very subtle, they "feel" exactly like your regular thoughts, they are oftentimes vague, and they are often closely tied to what you are already dealing with.

So, as you can see we Christians have a lot to deal with because we have our own weaknesses and sins and we have an active enemy who works to make things worse- and uses ideas and thoughts as a weapon against us. The enemy of our souls is looking for opportunities to take us down. This is why its so important to have a life of prayer and Bible study as well as church attendance. We need to keep close to God so we stay strong and so His Spirit can help us understand - and be freed from our trials and temptations.

Going to God in prayer for help in each situation is also the best tactical/immediate way to win the battle. My "Psalm of the day" is Psalm 83 and we can see how Asaph, the writer of this Psalm was wrestling with the enemy and went to prayer with the situation:

1 Do not keep silent, O God!
         Do not hold Your peace,
         And do not be still, O God!
2 For behold, Your enemies make a tumult;
         And those who hate You have lifted up their head.
3 They have taken crafty counsel against Your people,
         And consulted together against Your sheltered ones.
4 They have said, “Come, and let us cut them off from being a nation,
         That the name of Israel may be remembered no more. (NKJV)

So, the battle is real and oftentimes we can see in our worst moments of fear, depression, and temptation that the enemy is trying to worsen what might be a real situation - but we can win by staying strong with a daily time with the Lord- and then praying for help within each specific struggle as we're dealing with it.

Let's GO God!

(scriptures provided by Bible Gateway- New King James Version of the Bible copyrighted by Thomas Nelson)

My Treasures #1 Jacob & Laban

2011-06-19T16:38:00.000-05:00

I want to gradually share little "treasures" in life that have meant a lot to me. My ultimate treasures are my children and my wife but the Lord has led me through a lot and has created some additional treasures of encouragement, special happenings, testimonies of God's rescue, and special verses that mean a lot to me.

The first treasure I want to share with you happened during the last year I was a direct sales rep before I became a manager. It was the Year 2000. The software company I worked for was just figuring out how to run my new direct Inside Sales team I was a part of. They kept changing the comp plan and the rules and the quotas initially were sky-high. My fellow sales reps and I had a hard time trusting management due to the constant changes - and some of those changes were really not fair to the team.

I wrote before about how I made God my business partner this year and the first lesson the Lord taught me as part of being His business partner came from a Bible story. One of the great things the Lord does for people is take a Bible story or verse and bring it to life and help a person apply it to their situation- God does this all the time.

With my work situation uncertain and sales management making a series of changes - some of which were unfair- the Lord brought the story of Jacob and Laban from the Bible to me. I read how Jacob worked for Laban in the sheep business. Jacob was to get paid a certain way for working for Laban but Laban kept changing the way Jacob was to get paid (his compensation plan- amazing how well this ties-in to the sales world). It turns out that Laban changed Jacob's wages 10 times over a period of more than 20 years! You would think that Jacob and his family would have suffered during this time but the opposite happened. Every time Laban tried to change the compensation plan to serve his own greed- God would ensure Jacob was still blessed.

The Bible relates how Jacob served Laban honestly for all those years- and stayed faithful to God. Due to this God turned any dishonesty from his "manager" - into a blessing. Jacob trusted God so much that he stayed working for this man for more than 20 years! This doesn't mean Jacob was complacent or not an aggressive career person- he stayed until God moved him. He stayed and trusted God.

This is such a great story when you consider the job of being in sales. We have compensation plans that change- but we serve God really-- and not just people.

Let's go and trust God at work- no matter what. Lets serve honestly, work hard, and trust God He will bless us regardless of what management does. What an exceptional life of blessing and peace God will give us if we stay loyal, don't complain, and work hard because we trust God to take care of us!

Let's GO God!

I don't know anything and I feel helpless

2011-06-18T22:46:00.000-05:00

I really don't know anything. I don't know...
* How to change the world
* How to change my clothes
* How to safely raise kids surrounded by filth
* How to balance family dynamics
* How to balance anything
* How to overcome in life
* How to not be fake
* How to make permanent progress
* How to handle the future

I am so frustrated and I feel helpless. What a night. The kids were so bad I had to pull them out of the movie theater. I almost lost it on them. I ended up being so mad I just sent them to their rooms. I laid on my bed and prayed- not knowing what to do. I had already been strongly on their case the entire way home so I didn't want to blow up once we got home. I just sent them to their rooms.

My wife was out with a friend to encourage her so I am glad I got to have time with my daughters but it was a truly horrible night.

Unfortunately, this piled right on top of some child-worries I battled all day which has to do with the fact that most songs, a fair amount of roadside billboards, a not small amount of television commercials, a ton of lurking Websites, a lot of shows, and many peer influences all surround my family with influences I am afraid of. I am TERRIBLY afraid for the future of my kids based on the culture and environment around them which I have a difficult time protecting them from. My wife and I are in different places as far as level of protection although we both know its important so that adds a little stress as well.

I am in a bad place tonight. Very bad.

I add on top of the fact that I have been pure and free from sexual immorality for about the same duration as my marriage which is just shy of 13 years and the worry I have had the last couple days has been, "How am I going to stay pure for the next 13 years surrounded by the HELL that I see every day being the red-blooded man I am?"

Tough night. Tough issues. Its hard to be a man of God sometimes.

Lord- you know what I have to do and I don't. So, Let's go God...

The hope they have is the power of prayer

2011-06-17T07:38:00.000-05:00

Oftentimes when we pray for someone- or for a group of people such as a family we are providing something incredible for them. People who are trapped by pain or sin oftentimes cannot see or think clearly. People whose lives are a train wreck often do not know how to fix themselves or how bad it is. Lifestyle habits, family traits, history, and dramatic events can "program" people deeply - and all they know how to do is follow that program like a computer follows software instructions.

So, when we see a person or family surrounded by bad lifestyle choices, pain, loss, rebellion, or sin we need to keep in mind they cannot help themselves. Its good to be compassionate toward these people who cross our paths or are in our lives because if we were in their shoes- would we do any better?

But there is a hope for this. There is a ministry awaiting us if we will answer the call. Are we hurt enough by seeing their situation? Are we worried enough about the direction they are heading in- or do we just want to use them for a point of judgment or gossip? What are we willing to do? The hope these people have is US. The hope they have is the power of prayer through us.

We have the ability to come before the Lord and make requests of God to help them. God answers prayer. He is faithful. God always answers every prayer. When we come before the Lord on behalf of someone we cooperate with the Holy Spirit in His work to help them, set them free, and save them. Whether we are praying for someone to receive salvation or whether we are praying for a Believer who is afflicted in some way - either way when we pray we bring detailed problems before the Lord and we pray specifically for His help.

When we come before the Lord to pray for someone we do something they cannot do for themselves. Through God's power we initiate change in the situation that they would not or could not ask for. Through God's infinite vision and wisdom which He brings to all of His answers to prayer we bring life into a dead situation, hope to hopelessness, resource to poverty, freedom to the captive, healing to the sick, and help to the helpless.

The people who are in our circle of influence or who God causes us to become aware of in our lives need us. They need intervention. They don't need judgment and usually they are powerless to change and unable to listen to your advice. They need someone to stand in front of the enemy with the shield of faith and the sword of the Spirit and STOP his advance in their lives.

Scripture has some pretty amazing stories of answer to prayer. You can read the Book of 2nd Chronicles in the Bible and be very encouraged in this way. I'll share a quick scripture in the New Testament of the Bible right now to encourage you in prayer.

The story of the Apostle Peter being imprisoned in the Book of Acts is a great lesson on prayer. King Herod had put the Apostle Peter in prison intending to kill him. Read what happened when the local church prayed for him:

Acts 12:5-7 "Peter was therefore kept in prison, but constant prayer was offered to God for him by the church. And when Herod was about to bring him out, that night Peter was sleeping, bound with two chains between two soldiers; and the guards before the door were keeping the prison. Now behold, an angel of the Lord stood by him, and a light shone in the prison; and he struck Peter on the side and raised him up, saying, “Arise quickly!” And his chains fell off his hands."

Peter escaped a physical prison through a miracle initiated by prayer - you and I can help people escape prisons as well. There is nothing impossible for God and if we needed to pray a persecuted pastor out of jail - I know God would do it. But often, the people in our lives are in prisons of their past, their sins, and their pain. WE can cooperate with God in the advance of His Kingdom on Earth by praying for people's freedom - and just as the church in Acts prayed for Peter's freedom and God set him free- in the same way when we pray for God's help in someone's life- He WILL come through- not just sometimes- EVERY TIME.

Its up to us, this is very urgent, there are so many people surrounding us whom NO ONE is praying for- can you imagine that? God has chosen to act powerfully through our prayers- we cannot neglect this call. Advance freedom, rescue people, advance God's Kingdom in the lives of the people in your circle of influence or whom God bring's to your attention- through the power of regular, faithful, and believing prayer.

Let's GO friends... and Let's GO God!

Personal Revival

2011-06-16T08:07:00.000-05:00

I was asking the Lord what to write about today and hoping it would have some tie-in to my "Psalm of the day" which was Psalm 79 but I was puzzled because it went on and on about God's people being destroyed by the nations. This actually happened to the Jewish nation as accounted in the Old Testament. Jerusalem was destroyed, the land was pillaged, countless were killed, and the majority of the survivors were taken away to live in a new land. I couldn't figure out how recounting this could have any value in a blog article.

Honestly what I wanted to write about, and I hope to soon, is how the online world is like a whole new land - and how we can all be missionaries in this new land whether that be through social media sites like Facebook/others, through blogs and Websites, through Twitter, or through email messages.

As I sat here scanning over the Psalm again I realized there was an important message in there- but it wasn't something that would be attractive or popular. It would definitely bring some heat if I wrote about it... so anyway here we go.

Here is how Psalm 79 starts:
1 O God, the nations have come into Your inheritance;
         Your holy temple they have defiled;
         They have laid Jerusalem in heaps.
2 The dead bodies of Your servants
         They have given as food for the birds of the heavens,
         The flesh of Your saints to the beasts of the earth.
3 Their blood they have shed like water all around Jerusalem,
         And there was no one to bury them.
4 We have become a reproach to our neighbors,
         A scorn and derision to those who are around us.
5 How long, LORD?
         Will You be angry forever?
         Will Your jealousy burn like fire?
6 Pour out Your wrath on the nations that do not know You,
         And on the kingdoms that do not call on Your name.
7 For they have devoured Jacob,
         And laid waste his dwelling place.

Most of the visitors to this blog are from America. There are a few around the world (by the way hello- or "howdy" as they say here in Texas!). But in America we have a problem which this Psalm addresses. Remember the first verse..."O God, the nations have come into Your inheritance; your holy temple they have defiled; they have laid Jerusalem in heaps." The issue I want to point out is that we've let the nations come into us- instead of us going to the nations. Its not so much that we've been invaded however- its that we've sucked-in like a sponge the philosophies, priorities, and standards of the world around us - but what we've allowed in has begun to poison us.

Psalm 79 goes on and on about how God's people have been invaded, their temple has been destroyed, and the nations have taken over their land. The parallel I will bring up today is its possible to be a Christian, to have repented and given one's life to follow Jesus Christ, but to become very slowly corrupted by the influences of this world. No one ever woke up in the morning and said, "You know what, today I am going to backslide". No, its a very slow process. If you put a living frog into a pot of boiling water it will jump out immediately. If you put a living frog into room-temperature water and slowly turn up the temperature it will not perceive the change- and it will eventually die from the water as it begins to boil. The frog didn't mean to die- it was tricked. There are at least 4 issues that are slowly ruining the faith of many Christians in America:

Issue #1:
We've been tricked. We too are placed in an environment that seems safe- but can slowly kill us spiritually. Its easy to lose your spiritual identity, uniqueness, freshness, and fervency when living in America because we have a lot of freedom, a lot of resources, and an independent attitude as a country. In America we believe in freedom, we don't like people to restrict us, and we believe everyone has rights. Due to this, as a culture, we feel we can -and should be able to- do anything we want. So, our freedom is wonderful but it creates an attitude that no one should restrict us. So, we live in a culture that despises any restriction- that is issue #1.

Issue #2:
We are prosperous. In America, even those who have less- have generally plenty. When people have resources and an ability to acquire what is needed there is a tendency to forget the Lord and not depend on Him. If we have what we need we are not driven to pray and seek the Lord for needs. We have to seek the Lord because we want to and choose to- nothing external compels us to seek the Lord in America- that is issue #2.

Issue #3:
We are so busy. Stress, work, family, kid's activities, finances, chores, bills, and worries fill our lives- those things are VERY loud in our ears and they FILL our eyes and our mind. It is difficult to spend time on an invisible life, faith, and God - when visible things are overwhelming you- that is issue #3.

Issue #4:
Voices and images surround us with pictures and ideas of things that promise to satisfy us. When you're tired and stressed and need an outlet you have every product you could think of, every type of television show to fit every interest, every kind of Website you could imagine, every kind of shopping you could need, and a song or movie for every occasion or interest. In America you can't even use a restroom without seeing an advertisement for something. We are absolutely drenched with ideas, images, and offers of things to relieve stress, bring pleasure, or entertain us. Since America is free, doesn't believe in restricting freedom, and its competitive -- we find that the voices and images get louder, bolder, and edgier in order to continue to satisfy and attract people. This same approach works with selling perfume, a computer game, a TV show, or anything. The world continually looks for the next thing to get attention or shock as a competitive edge. So we find we are surrounded by choices that continue to push into stronger and bolder areas all the time. As a result of this escalating push the things that we accept as normal are the same things that before would have bothered us. So, issue #4 is we are surrounded by ever-escalating voices, images, and choices that dull us to things that should shock us and they pollute our minds and lives.

The Answer:
So, what is the answer if we are in a culture that doesn't believe in restricting itself, we are prosperous and don't need to pray for our needs, we're too busy to have time for God, and we are surrounded by things that continually pull away our eyes, ears, and minds into things that get worse all the time? How do we avoid having our faith in God shipwrecked in this environment? What can we do to avoid being a boiled frog? The answer is to work with the Lord to un-do the invasion of the temple we saw in Psalm 79. The answer is to cleanse the temple and restore its true purpose. We are God's temple when we accept Christ as Savior and Lord. The purpose of a temple is to worship God, draw near to God, know God, and learn from God. A temple is something that is special, set apart, and pure. We are not going to receive motivation, encouragement, or help from the culture around us to cleanse our temple and put God back in priority. We are going to have to go to God ourselves and ask for His help to make things right.

The great thing is, as loud as the culture is, we can still get quiet with God. As busy as we are- we have the choice of what we do with our time. As much freedom as we may have in America- we can choose to restrict ourselves from things that may not bring us closer to God. As much prosperity as we may have- we can still seek God as urgently as if we had to ask for our daily bread.

Here is the great thing- if we decide to choose to seek the Lord, prioritize prayer, read His Word, have a strong filter on what we allow into our eyes, ears, and in our home we can certainly have a personal revival. I heard a preacher once say, "Do you want a revival? Draw a circle on the ground, stand in the circle, and say 'Lord revive me'". The Bible says "Draw near to God and he will draw near to you"- this WORKS. And when we draw near to God he actually fans the flames of desire for Him within our hearts so we find that we actually want Him more.

Its not about figuring it all out- its about coming to Him.

Let's GO God!

Using our lessons of God's help

2011-06-15T07:26:00.000-05:00

God wants to take our challenges and turn them into victories so that we remember the victories and learn to trust Him in every area of our lives. He shows us His love and His power by answering our prayers so that we will both trust Him- and lovingly follow Him.

Today during my time with the Lord I was reading Psalm 78 and it went on and on about how God had shown the people of Israel amazing miracles. He delivered them out of slavery in Egypt with amazing miracles, he fed them miraculously in the desert, he caused water to come out of a rock, and many other awesome displays of his power and loving care for his people.

But Israel did not learn from the powerful things God had done in their past. They did not look at impending threats and make the choice to trust God based on His goodness they had seen in the past.

Psalm 78 shows 2 major mistakes Israel made:
1.) They did not take God's past help and use their experiences with Him to face new problems and threats by thinking, "Well, God has been so good up to this point and he rescued us from this problem, and that threat, and this need - I don't know how He's going to do it but I know He'll come through again".

2.) They also turned aside to other gods and did not stay faithful to God. So again, they did not take God's past help and use their experiences with him to stay faithful by thinking, "Well, God has been so good up to this point and rescued us from so many situations- I will stay firmly loyal to this God. I will stay pure in my heart for Him. I will purify my lifestyle out of reverence for this God. This God is so awesome that if He has rescued me in this way- He must love me and have wonderful things for me that are better than the sin and impurity of this world.

My prayer time this morning was neat because I got to really exercise the lesson of Psalm 78 in my own life. My prayer is always before my Bible reading so I didn't know this lesson would be coming. By the way that is the miracle of seeking God daily and making a place for Him in your time and in your heart- you'll start seeing Him orchestrate lessons for you too. (He is the sweetest person you can possibly imagine) So anyway, I was walking around my house in my prayer time and I always start off with thanking the Lord. I do this because I like it. It is a sweet and incredible time to walk through situations in your life and thank the Lord for His help with them one-by-one. Today as I was listing out neat answers to prayer (some of them I prayed as a little boy that I now see active in my life- its staggering how God eventually answers all of our prayers) and I saw such a pattern of faithfulness and such a pattern of plans the Lord had put in place for me and my family that I, unknowingly, did what Psalm 78 tries to teach - and I said to God, "Ok, God I am going to trust you with xyz real-life situation - I believe you have a plan that I cannot see right now so I am going to trust you and walk in what I know right now".

It was neat to apply my knowledge of how good the Lord is in my life- to present and future problems and challenges. So neat.

So my encouragement to you is: do a time of prayer where you thank God for everything you can possibly think of. Then, after you do that, take the lesson of His faithfulness and commit to Him that you will firmly trust Him with other situations.

By the way - this works for anyone. If you read my testimony on this page you'll see that I'm a nobody and I thought I was stupid for most of my life. Its God who does the work in us if we will just draw near to Him. So try what I said- you'll be blessed!

Let's GO God!

Frontline Stories #1: The One Hour a Week Movement

2011-06-14T07:45:00.000-05:00

Yesterday my friend Martin and I launched, on this blog, the "One Hour a Week Movement" which urges all Christians to spend an hour every week in evangelistic local outreach.

Every day I read a Psalm in the Bible, in order, all the way through the Psalms, then I start again- this is my "Psalm of the day". Today's Psalm was 77 and there are a couple of verses that speak to what I wanted to cover today.
11 I will remember the works of the LORD;
         Surely I will remember Your wonders of old.
12 I will also meditate on all Your work,
         And talk of Your deeds.
13 Your way, O God, is in the sanctuary;
         Who is so great a God as our God?
14 You are the God who does wonders;
         You have declared Your strength among the peoples.
15 You have with Your arm redeemed Your people,
         The sons of Jacob and Joseph.

The verses above from Psalm 77 talk about it being a positive thing to think about and share the works God has done in our lives. It talks about how God does wonders and how it is He who is the one who redeems/saves people. This is a pretty incredible Psalm considering what I wanted to blog about today was frontline stories of our One Hour a Week strategy! It IS God who saves people and he DOES do wonders- when we get out there for just one hour a week - He will show up.

Story 1.) "The friendly couple" - Sunday when we went to a local apartment complex we knocked on doors and handed out flyers inviting people to church. We probably knocked on 25-30 doors. We came to one door and a young woman and man were there. There seemed to be other people in and out as we talked to them so it might have been a household where several people lived. We introduced ourselves, talked about the church, handed them a flyer and then as we were talking I had an idea that came to me with some conviction and passion. I said, "You know what, its a miracle we are here today. Martin and I only do this for one-hour a week. There are thousands and thousands of doors we could have knocked-on - but we knocked on yours today. Not only that but you were here when we knocked. I want you to consider the possibility that God is reaching out to you- he's doing a work in your life and He wants you. God orchestrated today so that we would connect with you out of all the people in this area- and this apartment complex. Maybe you should consider visiting this church - if you give God access to your life, if you reach out to God, he'll speak to you- I guarantee it 100%. He will change your life." They seemed very receptive to this and there was a sweet spirit as we engaged with them.

Story 2.) "A lonely man and his dog" - we met with another man who couldn't have been more than 45 years old but he seemed to be almost a shut-in. He had a little chihuahua dog and when he opened the door to his apartment you could see it was quite a mess. He seemed to be lonely with a life in disarray and without hope. He came to the door wearing black,worn-out casual clothes and black dress socks pulled up to his calves with one toe sticking out. As always we were very kind to him - we don't care what he looks like. We opened up, as always, talking about the church and giving him a flyer. We always joke with people when we start off that we're not selling anything- they always smile at that. The approach we used with him was three-fold. We highlighted the fact that you don't have to dress up to go to church, we talked about how its a casual and very friendly environment, and we talked about how sometimes it gets lonely living alone and the church would be a great place to come be with people and be encouraged. He seemed interested and, as many people do, he said he "had been meaning" to go to church- he even pointed out a picture of Jesus just inside his door as if it assure us of his sincerity. The last thing we covered was that the church was not judgmental- he seemed to like that a lot. We mentioned this because there is no telling what kind of lifestyle that guy lives and Jesus didn't come to save clean, pure, healthy people- he came to "seek and to save that which was lost". In fact Jesus described Himself as a Shepherd willing to leave 99 sheep - to go find 1 that wandered off.

As you can see we take a very casual, friendly, and humble approach when we talk to these people- the lives Martin and I used to live were very sinful. We are truly those that have been plucked from the fire. We just want to get out there, show up, and allow God an opportunity to do his wonders! Its fun, its exciting, and its amazing to share in the fellowship of what GOD is doing at work in local missions outreach.

Try it- one hour a week - watch God show up. In your weakness- watch his WONDERS.

Let's GO God!

The "One Hour a Week Movement" - The Kickoff!

2011-06-13T08:11:00.001-05:00

My friend Martin and I have been using Sunday afternoons for several month to go to a lower-economic area that also happens to be near his church and invite people to visit his church. We go for roughly an hour plus drive time. We are typically able to knock on doors of 20-30 apartments/trailers/homes.

We start out by introducing ourselves in a friendly way, we joke that we're not selling anything, and we say that we're out inviting people to church. We hand them a card about the church which is probably 5"x5" and has a brief description about the church, directions, address, phone number, and their Website. If people are not there we tuck the card into the crack in the door because it may be a very long time before we come back through there so we might as well give them the information.

We always start off talking about the church because people can relate to that, they know what it is, and it doesn't confront them with anything personally. We assure them that the church is a warm, friendly, and non-judgmental place and let them know casual attire is OK. So, talking about church has been a good icebreaker for us!

As we are talking about the church or after that part of the discussion we listen to what God may put on our hearts for the situation and we look to see if someone is receptive. If we get the feeling the Lord has provided us with an "open door" of a responsive person and we have an idea of something inspirational, encouraging, or even challenging to tell someone - we always make those comments as well. The church conversation is just to have something to talk about- and yes we DO really want them to come to church but our ultimate goal is that God will lead us to people whom He has prepared to hear about the Lord. We feel no performance pressure whatsoever- we just GO like the Lord said.

If possible we always try to go together- the Bible even says Jesus sent them out 2 by 2. Going as a team allows us to encourage one another, relate to people in different ways, and by having two people as part of the regular outreach it provides accountability and safety: 1.) You never know what temptation or even danger may happen when someone opens the door, and 2.) By having two people involved if one person secretly doesn't want to go on a certain day- having the other person there keeps them focused!

We've been doing this for several months now, we do miss a week here or there if our kids have a recital or there is a birthday etc but we try to do it every week there isn't a strong conflict. You can't beat yourself up if you miss a week- God isn't beating you up.

We have been able to observe several things through these experiences. First, we find ourselves very excited when we are out there doing this and afterward. Yesterday for example we felt like we drank an energy drink by the time we were done- we were pumped and it was over a hundred degrees! Something else we've observed is that the Lord really goes with us and orchestrates the situation. You have to remember that it is really the Holy Spirit's job to draw people to God so when you participate in an effort of evangelism you get to walk in the flow of His presence, power, and purpose. Because of this you get to see miracles of various kinds happen. I have no doubt that the Lord could lead us to pray for someone who is sick or injured although that has not happened yet.

Tomorrow I am going to write about 2-3 experiences we've had that show how the Lord opens doors and creates opportunities when we go.

For today however I am going to wrap-up and introduce you to the "One Hour a Week Movement". This is a challenge my friend Martin and I are launching today. We are encouraging every Believer to invest one-hour per week in local missions outreach. One hour of evangelism per week. Go to an area you feel a burden for, get some invites from your church (or print your own), and go invite people to church- all the while praying that the Lord will create opportunities for you to share your faith in Christ. Its simple! We will be using this blog to share stories, examples, and ideas so that YOU too can do this but you don't have to wait. Find a Christian friend or family member- share this idea with them and plan YOUR first one-hour outreach. As a reminder- its one hour of sharing - drive time is extra.

Ok, that's it- tomorrow I'll share stories. Begin praying about what neighborhood God would have you start with!

Let's GO God. Let's have a great week of seeking God, continuing to put God first, and trusting Him!

The harvest is out there

2011-06-12T16:37:00.002-05:00

Out inviting folks to church with my friend Martin. Very supercharged about having the opportunity to do this. Its so neat that we can each get out there, be friendly, invite people to church, and if the opportunity presents itself- share the good news of Jesus as well. It was super hot but we had a great time and I think we ended with even more energy than we started with.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Final Day- "Put God First Test" - Day #30 - "In conclusion"

2011-06-12T14:56:00.001-05:00

Today is the final day of my 30-day "Put God First Test". My job was out of control and I was working every night after the kids went to sleep until 11:30, 12:00, 1:00, and even later. I realized I had an idol on the throne of my heart- workaholism. The idol threatened me that I would never make a difference, I would never be significant, and I would never stay caught up at work unless I worshiped him by driving myself insanely hard at work- and after work. Every day I went in to work in order to try to make a difference and every day I was so busy and so consumed by the urgency of the hour that I rarely had time to be proactive. My idea was that if I worked every night late after the kids went to bed the insanity of my work wouldn't affect my family. I believed a lie. I thought that the only value I bring to my family is being available to them. I didn't realize by neglecting God I was neglecting a treasure I could have given to my family.

So, I have been in a 30-day test of putting God first in my life. This involved still working hard at work but shutting down work stuff at a reasonable hour and getting some sleep- then waking up early to pray and spend time with God. I really enjoyed the time with the Lord and 30-days was long enough to form a fairly strong habit as well. I learned to really plan my day toward getting to bed at a reasonable time, learned to try to focus hard at work to knock out as much as possible during working hours, I am delegating more at work, and I even have prayed for help maybe a few times more than normal- yes He helped with those items too!

What I want to embark on now is simply continuing a life of seeking the Lord even more. What will happen to me, my life, and my family if I devote myself to seeking Him? What will happen if I continue to put Him first?

I'll keep blogging daily and tweeting. I've really enjoyed that. It has been a neat way to share things along the way as the Lord as shared them with me.

So... one more time.. but not the last - Let's GO God!

"Put God First Test" - Day #29 - "The violent take it by force"

2011-06-12T00:43:00.000-05:00

I am in the midst of a 30-day test... its really a test "on me". The test is putting God first in my life and my time. I am seeking to show myself if someone puts God first their job and life will not only not be harmed- but in the long run it will thrive.

I was not at the beach today though it must look like it. I was at a water park with my daughters and their friends practicing NOT looking at the lady who thought it was a good idea to wear her golden bra here.

I had a friend when I first came to Christ who I really admired and looked up to in the Lord who used to look at a girl, smile, look back at us guys and say, "nice creation" and justified it to me when I asked about it by saying, "what's wrong she is God's creation?" I really struggled to answer that but for me it was lustful and took me in the direction of my old life- and I did not want to go back there. Not more than a few months after this incident my friend was acting out tremendous sexual immorality. It didn't stop with a look. He became so bound by sexual immorality that he nearly shipwrecked his Faith and it took a lot of time and pain to come back to the Lord.

I didn't choose to feel the way I do about trying to be a pure man. I can't say that reading the Bible has made me this way. I can't say that I merely want to spare my wife and children from pain, hurt, and potential divorce. The burning fever I have to stay with God, stay with my wife and family, and FIGHT sexual temptation isn't natural or something I can explain. I still have the same urges and sometimes being pure is a fight. I was shocked that the magazine stand at a certain gas station caught my eye a couple of days ago- I remember the fear I felt when I glanced that way.. what if I fell..?

So, I feel inside of me the lusts of a man sometimes. My eyes work as well- or better than many guys and what interests my eyes is completely operational in me- what catches my eyes is as powerful as any guy. Running alongside that man within me I DO feel another man running. This man is responsible. He is afraid of hurting his children, hurting his wife, disappointing people, and embarrassing himself. (yes, pride is in him). But there is a third man running inside of me that is powerful and angry. This man pulls my eyes away from an irresponsible woman wearing something she shouldn't. This man is something else- something "other". This man sees and understands things- avoids things before they come. This man sees the outcome of good and evil. This man runs faster and harder than the others- the more I seek God with my life- the more I want to be like this man.

This man is the violent that can take the Kingdom of God by force. When we are born of God by coming to Jesus Christ you see- we don't cease becoming men but we become new men who desire and strive to serve the Lord. Something new is born within us that desires to serve the Lord- this desire can increase by actually seeking the Lord. Yes we still have the ability to fall- but we have the ability to run- to run hard and chase the Lord. We have his power- we are not alone. We have his wisdom- and we are given understanding. We will still battle and fight things and we'll have to learn how to live a new way but we receive a deposit from God that grows and grows the more we seek God.

The Christian life is not like the old life. Step into the Light and run with us.

Let's GO God. Let's run.

"Put God First Test" - Day #28 - "A time of dishonesty"

2011-06-10T07:43:00.000-05:00

I am in an experiment to show myself a person can put God first, seek first his kingdom, and spend time with God daily. The experiment seeks to show if a person does put God first then not only will a crazy job and life not fall apart- it will thrive.

The last year I was in direct sales, before I moved into sales management was 2000. I was in a new group that year and our management was trying to figure it all out. My quota was enormous as I was soon to find out. The economy was still ok and I was covering the State of New Jersey at the time. As we were coming down to the last 2 weeks of the quarter I was dying. I was to end the quarter at, if I remember correctly, 34% of quota. Tough situation to be in as a sales person in a new group-new role because you can easily be put on a performance plan and eventually fired for that level of attainment in technology sales. In addition, you won't make any money at 34% of your quota.

I had a modest order come in with 2 weeks to go in the quarter and I made the decision to hold the order and not process it until the new quarter started. My reasoning was because my quota was so high the order wouldn't even move the needle and since my quota was unfair- save it for the next quarter and hope for a better quota. I held the order by working with a reseller who delayed processing.

I've regretted this for 11 years now and there are only perhaps 4 people on the planet I've told until now. I can remember the company name, the amount of the deal, the name of the reseller, the reseller rep, and as I mentioned- my final quarterly attainment that quarter. It was the first and last time I've held an order. Holding an order in sales is very dishonest. In sales you should always fight to the last to get every order in. Your company counts on you to push and scrap for every order of any size. I was selfish and vindictive because my quota was too high. I was looking out for myself and putting my interests first. I justified my behavior but it was short-sighted, wrong, dishonorable, it did not reflect any leadership- and it betrayed Christ. I WAS a Christian at the time.

The beginning of the next month began the beginnings of my guilt. I turned the order in right away but nothing could assuage my guilt. I made a decision the beginning of the next quarter that I would stop being selfish, stop putting my interests first, and stop manipulating my job. I asked God to forgive my cheating and lying and I made a watershed decision that has changed my life since that time.

I asked God to be my business partner. I asked God to be a part of everything about my job, my career, and all the details of my daily life. I asked God to help me to be honest- not just to avoid guilt - but because I trust Him. I have lived an imperfect business life since that day and have failed plenty but I continue to ask God to be my business partner and he has taught me so much about relating what I read in the Bible to the business world. He has taught me to trust in Him. He's taught me its ok to set aside pride and admit I've made a mistake. He's taught me to look out for other people.

The neat thing was my little prayer of asking for forgiveness, asking God to help me to live a pure life in business, and asking Him to be my business partner was all I did. But God listens to prayer - and HE began the process of changing my life from there. It wasn't about me being a good guy - it was about me being a BAD guy but getting a GOOD God involved.

There have been many lessons and God is involved daily. I have so much to learn and I still often feel like I don't know what I am doing in business. But I have a business partner who is honest, who is wise, who wants to be involved, and wants to be the Lord of my life. All I could do is ask for His help and partnership and he took me in and agreed to it. Jesus said, "whoever comes to me I will in no way cast off" (my paraphrase). I did a really bad thing- but God turned it into a life-changing business partnership and an 11 year learning and growth process.

What do you have that you did wrong that you can turn to God? Do you have guilt about something that is plaguing you? What if you turned that failure into a request for forgiveness and committed your life to God? What if you asked the Lord to own your life and be a partner with you? If He is made the Lord- He can turn it around and you will be amazed as you watch him slowly transform both you- and your situation.

Let's GO God!

"Put God First Test" - Day #27 - "Police lights at 3:30am"

2011-06-09T08:05:00.000-05:00

I am in an experiment to show myself a person can put God first, seek first his kingdom, and spend time with God daily. The experiment seeks to show if a person does put God first then not only will a crazy job and life not fall apart- it will thrive.

So tired this morning. Its been a very busy week and a half in my job and family life. When I pray in the morning I usually walk around the house. I have this perfect circle I can walk. It helps to pray-walk because it gets the blood moving and its impossible to actually fall asleep this way. I could fall asleep anywhere so walking is a good idea.

This whole concept of getting up early(ish) to spend time with God has been a life-long dream of mine but I am such an anti-morning person I never thought it would be possible. I have a funny story to tell you how I first started being able to get up in the morning to pray. It was about 14-15 months ago when, at 3:30 in the morning, we heard banging on our front door and our doorbell was going off. Naturally, I slept through it but my wife woke me up and said, "Brian someone is banging on our front door- and I think its the police!" I walked out of our room and sure enough through the front window I saw a police car shining his headlights into our living room and his red flashing police lights were filling the neighborhood.

With my heart pounding like crazy I stepped up to the front door and made myself open it. It turns out we had left our garage door open and a street nearby had some break-ins. The officer was patrolling around, saw our garage door open at 3:30am, and thought the worst... The officer asked me some questions and let me go. After I closed the garage door I was too wired to sleep so I decided to spend time with the Lord and had a long devotion. I was tired early that next evening and went to bed early- and was able to wake up early. And so it went for months.

So, that difficult wake-up in the middle of the night led to my ability to have morning devotions which I had always thought was impossible- God had to do something radical to change my paradigm. The Lord answered a lifelong prayer of helping the worst morning person in the world have morning devotions- but he had to shake me up to do it. It did NOT look like anything GOOD was going to happen when I was woken up at 3:30 by a banging front door and police lights- it was frankly terrifying- but you can see God's purposes were higher than mine. He did something good through this but I had to go through the tough time to get something good out of it...

God did it again yesterday- he turned my negative situation from the day before into something good. Remember my blog from yesterday morning before work titled, "Well, I failed"- I was so frustrated about things at work the day prior, that I had not been a good example. I had been negative, hopeless, despairing, and sarcastic about job circumstances. But yesterday, the things I learned from the negative/despairing day actually turned into an idea to fix something. BECAUSE OF the pain of the "bad day" I went through I thought of an incredible idea that is going to help every sales rep in the company get detailed information about their accounts- in an easy way. I already have someone implementing this- should be done by Friday. I have been at this company 2.5 years and I have never thought about this idea.

I had no idea when I wrote the blog "Well, I failed" that God took me through that in order to do a lot of good for a lot of people. I'm always looking for ways to empower and equip our sales people and due to God putting me through the hard time- our sales people will have better information on their accounts.

I think you can see a pattern here that God has taken me through some tough times - that ultimately He turns to my good. I think what you and I really have to do when police lights are going off in the middle of the night or jobs are going badly is trust God. I've noticed in walking with the Lord that you can't see where you are headed- you only get to see today. However God sees tomorrow and not only that- he has a plan. Romans 8 says God turns everything to the good of those that follow Christ. I can really see that.

Last thing- I spoke with a friend yesterday afternoon when I implemented the new idea (he had seen the bad attitude the day before that and then also the result of the tough day so he got to see the before/after). I said to him, "sometimes we don't realize we're being blessed even right in the middle of a really bad or dark time". So true.

Lets GO God!

"Put God First Test" - Day #26 - "Well, I failed"

2011-06-08T09:25:00.000-05:00

I am in an experiment to show myself a person can put God first, seek first his kingdom, and spend time with God daily. The experiment seeks to show if a person does put God first then not only will a crazy job and life not fall apart- it will thrive.

Its been a busy personal and work life for a week and a half. I've continued with this experiment nonetheless. After yesterday I know that I have such a long way to go... Yesterday at work I was trying to fix a certain situation for the company and every way I turned found me with more questions. I would begin to work on a certain aspect of the issue and immediately I would find a discrepancy. It was like peeling an onion and each layer I pulled back- there was another layer.

I really got frustrated about this and I even vocalized it. I even made a couple of sarcastic comments outloud. Obviously this is a bad idea because I am a people manager and there is no value in highlighting negative things to my reps. On the contrary, what I should be doing is encouraging them- and giving them solutions to deal with our challenges. So, I can really say I failed yesterday...

I think I need more rest so I am going to try to get some in the next couple of nights- and what I really want to do is have a little longer 1:1 time with the Lord and really soak in his presence. I love in Psalm 23 where it says "He leads me beside still waters, he restores my soul". What I really need is a time for the Lord to lead me quietly and restore my soul (soul= mind, will, and emotions). So, I am going to find a place to get away with the Lord maybe that will be on my lunch time today or if it has to wait until tomorrow - so be it.

I have to remember that whether I am in a test or not, whether I blog or not, the Lord is my Shepherd- NOT ME. I so passionately wanted to do a good job at work that when the information I needed for my project was a mess and when I was also tired from too much stuff going on- I didn't step back and just take a deep breath and lean on the Lord- instead I used the human coping mechanisms of complaining, frustration, and sarcasm. I was a bad example- even on the same day I blogged about making a difference at work..

In spite of the fact that I failed I am so delighted with the fact that God never left me. I love the fact that this journey- is a journey and I'm not alone. I love that God is my Father and I can pick myself up off the ground, go get the rest and the extra time with the Lord that I need to restore my soul- and move forward with progress.

Thanks Lord for your comfort and solace- I look forward to spending some extra time 1:1 with you soon, help me to do that.

"Put God First Test" - Day #25 - "Making a difference at work"

2011-06-07T07:48:00.000-05:00

I am in an experiment to show myself a person can put God first, seek first his kingdom, and spend time with God daily. The experiment seeks to show if a person does put God first then not only will a crazy job and life not fall apart- it will thrive.

There is a great Bible passage that I've applied to my business life from time to time over the past several years. Its great how the Lord can illuminate a scripture to encourage us by applying it to our situation.

Here it is: Jeremiah 29:7 "And seek the peace of the city where I have caused you to be carried away captive, and pray to the LORD for it; for in its peace you will have peace."

The passage above was written to the Israelites whose cities had been destroyed, many of whose people had been killed, and who had been taken away from their homeland and forced to live in a foreign land and settle there. If anyone had an opportunity to be negative, doubting, frustrated, fearful, and vengeful it was these people.

But God sent them a messenger who told them to actually seek the peace of the city He had sent them to and he went so far as to tell them to pray for it. The Lord commanded and taught the people to rise above their immediate circumstances and take a new view. He showed them that if they would take the high road and seek the peace and prosperity of this foreign land - that they would be blessed by doing that.

God gave the exiled Israelites two instructions:
* Seek the peace of the place they live and work
* Pray for the place they live and work

We can apply those two principles in the places we live and work. First of all God commanded that His people do this good to their CAPTORS in EXILE. He did not expect them to sit around, be lazy, be hateful, be resentful, and to only do good if things were perfect! No he first said to seek the peace of the place they were living and working. To seek the peace of a place I think you have to be willing to forgive and take the high road. To seek the peace of a place I think you have to actually do proactive good. He said "seek the peace" - he didn't say just sit there and do no harm... The other principle was to pray for the place they lived and worked. This means actually understanding we can have a spiritual impact on the people around us- and on the neighborhood we live in and on the organization we work for. The Lord said to pray for those people who had taken them captive.

I'd like to apply this lesson to our workplaces. God does not call us to only conduct ourselves proactively and do good things for our company, boss, fellow employees, or our customers when things are nice and perfect. As you can see God expects us to reach out, make a difference, seek the peace, and yes - even pray for our company, our boss, our employees, our peers, and our customers.

I don't want you to take this as a mandate that you have to do by yourself. Ask the Lord for an attitude shift. Ask God for help. Ask the Lord for ideas about what you can do. Ask Him to help you make a difference. Actively forgive people who do you wrong-- and make the decision that you will be kind, work hard, fix things if they need fixing, and not be a complainer. Come to the Lord and ask for help on this- you are not on your own. If you put yourself and your job in God's hands and start conducting yourself like this- do it because you trust God - do it because you choose to work for Him. If you put yourself in God's hands- you'll have his help.

"Put God First Test" - Day #24 - "My ONE Prayer"

2011-06-06T07:14:00.000-05:00

I am in an experiment to show myself a person can put God first, seek first his kingdom, and spend time with God daily. The experiment seeks to show if a person does put God first then not only will a crazy job and life not fall apart- it will thrive.

My church, Gateway Church, did a neat series some time ago called "One Prayer". Pastor Robert and a series of our other pastors and visiting speakers preached a message about what their life's prayer is. Their life's prayer was defined as the one thing that summed up their life's focus and desire.

I had the idea a few days ago to write what my "One Prayer" is so I am going to do that today. I think there are several focus messages of my life such as: trusting God, victory over immorality, prayer, and victory over low self-esteem. However, as far as the "sum" of my life's desire I would have to say my "One Prayer" is that myself and my children and wife would really know the Lord. Not that we would merely be Christians, not that we would just go to church, and not even that we would simply be radical for God- no. My One Prayer would have to be that we would deeply and intimately know the Lord, be close to him, and have constant and growing fellowship with him- each of us.

This One Prayer would include that each member of my family and I would have a daily time with God- but it goes so far beyond that. I want my family to KNOW GOD and not just with a casual knowledge but a deep and special communion. I pray that we would each know God in the closest and most special way he has planned for us- that we would take that relationship as far as possible. So, yes it starts with spending daily time with the Lord, it moves into a regular fellowship with God on a constant basis, and it continues with the Lord's closest possible relationship as He sees it in his best vision for our lives- that is my One Prayer.

Bible Passage:
Psalm 69 is my Bible passage today and it was interesting how many prophetic, forward-looking things it had in it about Jesus' suffering. It is constantly amazing how so many details of the Messiah's life, suffering, and strategy of redemption for mankind were shared with us in advance in the Old Testament of the Bible. I'd love to find a book that lists all of these prophecies (does anyone know of such a book- please comment if so!).

Let's GO God - we have a critical new hire training I am hosting at work and I need your help to make it a good success!

"Put God First Test" - Day #23 - "Worship set me free"

2011-06-05T23:01:00.000-05:00

I am in an experiment to show myself a person can put God first, seek first his kingdom, and spend time with God daily. The experiment seeks to show if a person does put God first then not only will a crazy job and life not fall apart- it will thrive.

I thought this was a test to show the above- you know what it really is turning out to be? A healthy lifestyle habit of spending time with the Lord and planning things around that, a time to learn from the Lord, and a trick. The trick is on me. I thought this was about me reaching out to God and hoping he would help me with life because I made him the center of life. It may well be that but its more. The trick is that the more I draw near to the Lord- the more of Him I want. The more I push myself toward God every day - the more I want Him. The trick is God is addicting- and the trick is on me.

I heard about a guy years and years ago who was single and a major weight-lifting / working-out guy. I remember someone telling me in awe that he wouldn't go out with his girlfriend until he had worked out. That is such a funny and immature thing to remember. I think what resonates with me in the story is the no-limits devotion of it even though its a silly example. If a guy like that can make a girlfriend take the back-burner for a bicep- how much more should I make life take a back-burner to seek the Lord.

Ok, all of that was just a bonus- I want to tell you about my worship experience at church today. I was singing to the Lord with everyone else and my mind slightly went off track for a minute. I was thinking about the Middle East and the Muslim world and how vast and lost it seemed- it seemed impenetrable and hopeless in my mind. All of those thoughts cascaded over me as I sang with my mouth- but worried about these people with my heart. However as I sang maybe the Lord made me aware of the words I was singing or maybe what happened was independent of the words of that song but the Lord suddenly showed me that I had a stronghold in my mind or my heart. The stronghold was believing the Lord COULDN'T reach the Middle East and the Islamic peoples. Once I realized I had this fear, worry, and doubt and that I was intimidated by the thought of trying to reach the vast Islamic nations I felt sorry. I realized I had set these nations up before the Lord as unreachable. I understood fully that I had doubted the Lord.

Honestly, I believed a lie and the time of coming to the Lord in song and worship- even in my imperfect and distracted way allowed the Holy Spirit to identify and break a stronghold of doubt and hopelessness I had. I now wanted to believe God that they would all be saved! My heart went immediately from doubt- to belief that God could reach them!

Its marvelous when the Lord sets you free from any lie. When we come to worship it should just be with the simple motive to worship God - but He will often work on us during worship. My observation is that there are various tools the Lord uses to work on us. I've highlighted prayer a lot so far in these 23 days of the 30 day test but my worship experience today compels me to mention the tool or weapon of worship. We don't have to wait for a church service to sing for God. You can easily go to Pandora.com and type in "Chris Tomlin", "Hillsong United", "New Life Worship", or "Gateway Worship" (my church), and have a great experience of worshiping the Lord.

I now have a strong desire to pray in faith for Muslim lands. I am not sure where that is going but I don't think the Lord set me free from my blindness and doubt just to be free- I think I am supposed to pray for them. Lord help me!

Bible Passage:
Psalm 68 - this is what spoke to me in my Psalm of the day:
5 A father of the fatherless, a defender of widows,
         Is God in His holy habitation.
6 God sets the solitary in families;
         He brings out those who are bound into prosperity;
         But the rebellious dwell in a dry land.
......
³⁵ O God, You are more awesome than Your holy places.
         The God of Israel is He who gives strength and power to His people. Blessed be God!

My family and I have 2 "family Psalms". Our first one is Psalm 91 and Psalm 68 is our second one- so today is pretty special. If that sounds strange then you haven't yet experienced the unique and special beauty of adopting scriptures as your own. This particular Psalm is quite long and it has a lot of power in it but I highlighted three of the main verses that we like. V.5-6 is special because we love to think about our awesome God as being the "father of the fatherless, a defender of widows" - because it shows just how amazingly compassionate God is and it also highlights God's heart for adoption which we share. V6 also talks about how God frees people which is such an encouragement and then we love the last verse and how it says "The God of Israel is He who gives strength and power to His people. Blessed be God." Its like the author is so aware of God's help and the power God gives to His people he just has to wind it up with "Blessed be God". We get a real charge out of Psalm 68- and the God behind it.

Let's GO God!

All scriptures quoted in the New King James Version (NKJV) of the Bible which is Copyrighted by Thomas Nelson. Scriptures obtained from www.biblegateway.com

"Put God First Test" - Day #22 - "Signal Fires"

2011-06-05T00:37:00.001-05:00

I am in an experiment to show myself a person can put God first, seek first his kingdom, and spend time with God daily. The experiment seeks to show if a person does put God first then not only will a crazy job and life not fall apart- it will thrive.

In J.R.R. Tolkien's book "The Two Towers" there is an amazing scene. The great glistening white city of Minas Tirith is surrounded by hordes upon hordes of evil monsters, frightful unearthly creatures, and wicked men. They are assaulting the city once thought to be impenetrable with every siege weapon imaginable and numbers too vast to defend against. It seems all hope is lost but someone at the top of the castle lights a huge bonfire probably seven feet high - it was a signal fire. Miles away a signal station at the top of a mountain sees the signal fire at the castle and promptly lights their own large signal fire. Then deeper into the mountains miles and miles from there a further signal station lights their signal fire- and so it went through the mountains and over the hills, faithful guards and watchmen lighting fire after fire for hundreds of miles- signal fires delivering a message of great peril in the Kingdom of Gondor- and the City of Minas Tirith.

The story goes on that the Kingdom of Rohan, the horsemen allies of Gondor see the signal fires that have been relayed to them- and they gather horsemen warriors from far and wide- for battle. The Riders of Rohan ride those hundreds of miles bearing shield, and spear, and sword to come to the aid of their allies.

When they arrive they fill the hillside overlooking the city and quickly sweep down into the enemy with spears pointed and horses charging headlong. They smash through the stunned enemies and part them like a wave of the sea. I won't re-tell the rest of the story here but through additional support received the victory is won and Middle-Earth is saved again.

The reason I bring up his dramatic sequence from that story is to share with you a spiritual parallel that has come to mean a lot to myself and my family just today... The Lord has chosen to involve His people in his mission to rescue other people. He has chosen to defeat darkness through His people as well. One of the key ways he works is in response to the prayer of His people.

We too can respond to signal fires in people's lives and send God's help to them by praying for them. Send help to them- pray!

All scriptures quoted in the New King James Version (NKJV) of the Bible which is Copyrighted by Thomas Nelson. Scriptures obtained from www.biblegateway.com

"Put God First Test" - Day #21 - "Why put God first"

2011-06-03T07:38:00.001-05:00

I am in an experiment to show (myself primarily) that a person can put God first, seek first his kingdom, and spend time with God daily. The experiment seeks to show that if a person does put God first then not only will a crazy job and life not fall apart- it will thrive.

In Blogger in the administration area you have a tab called "Stats" and you can see basic things like how many visitors you had that day etc- I was checking this out yesterday and I saw interesting info about how people found the blog. One person apparently found the blog by typing in a search engine something like "where is 'put God first' in the New King James Version of the Bible'". I found that to be a really interesting question. Was this person trying to see if what I am doing is Biblical- in other words does the Bible tell us to put God first? Does this person not want to put God first so they are looking for a way out? Or does this person have a yearning for more of God and they just want Biblical support for the idea of putting God first? I'll never know but I just found that interesting!

Putting God first is certainly in the Bible but the actual phrase "Put God First", to my knowledge is not exactly in there-- in those exact words. But I've given a couple of times in this blog (like yesterday) a couple of verses about putting God first in your life. (Matthew 6 and Psalm 37)

I thought I would go ahead and give you, from my perspective, some reasons to put God first in your life. Yes, this blog is really for me and the Lord but to the extent that others read this I might as well share my reasons for putting God first to create a spark that my ignite someone else- to do a test.

Why Put God First?
* My main reason for working toward putting God first is I realized that my life was consumed with work- my life had become about my job and was not in-balance. My time with the Lord was not happening most days due to this.
* I want to put God first because to the extent that I have been able to experience glimpses of knowing God so far- I know I want more of Him.
* I want to fellowship and talk with Him, I want to hear His still, small voice.
* I have seen a lot of miraculous answers to prayer- and I want a multitude more of that.
* As I spend time with the Lord I know he will draw near to me (James 4:8).
* The more I seek Him, the more I am able to see life with greater understanding- and the more I am able to see Him working in situations.
* As I seek God daily I know my family and my children will see that and it will be something that inspires them to seek and know the Lord all their lives.
* Even though I haven't fully experienced what I do hope to see in this test yet as far as job help, by faith I understand that in the long-term by seeking first His Kingdom- he will really help me with the physical needs we have and with our jobs.

The Final Reason for Putting God First:
* I am 39 right now as I write this but I heard it said in a movie one time "because tomorrow I'll be 60" or something closely resembling that. That is the basis for the final reason I want to put God first. Time marches on. I won't live forever. What do I want the outcome of my life to be? The only question that will matter to me at the end of my life is, "What did I do with the treasure of my relationship with Jesus Christ?" I have to make life-changes now with the end in mind. I have to force big life changes now- to get the outcome of a life lived with God at its center.

I really hope other readers will get a spark- and make this life change but no matter what I have to keep pushing in this direction- in His direction. This blog is great but its really for God. What will I do with the treasure of my relationship with God?

Bible Passage:
Psalm 66 - this is what spoke to me in my Psalm of the day:
19 But certainly God has heard me;
         He has attended to the voice of my prayer.
20 Blessed be God,
         Who has not turned away my prayer,
         Nor His mercy from me!(NKJV)

That was such an encouraging couple of verses in Psalm 66 today.

Lets GO God! I trust you.

All scriptures quoted in the New King James Version (NKJV) of the Bible which is Copyrighted by Thomas Nelson. Scriptures obtained from www.biblegateway.com

"Put God First Test" - Day #20 - "The Idol of Workaholism"

2011-06-02T07:36:00.001-05:00

I am in an experiment to show (myself primarily) that a person can put God first, seek first his kingdom, and spend time with God daily. The experiment seeks to show that if a person does put God first then not only will a crazy job and life not fall apart- it will thrive.

I am a little backed up today as I think about my work/job day ahead. This is not easy. I have about 4 crucial things I need to get done in the next two days. It has been great to force myself for the past 20 days to go to bed at a reasonable hour- and then wake up to pray and spend time with the Lord. As far as how my job is faring during that time I think I am too close to the situation to see clearly right now. I have had a few customer-facing successes during this period of time for sure and certainly I haven't royally messed up anything at work by not working late into the night. I would say my "going above-and-beyond" type stuff hasn't made as much progress as I would like.

On a personal front our household situation has gone quite well as we've re-financed during this period of time and knocked out some other home-related "to-do" items.

I am going to stick with this approach of seeking the Lord daily regardless of whatever the short-term outcome is because, frankly, I want to spend time with the Lord. I WANT to be close to him. My life is sooo short. What I do- or do not do at work is very temporary. I still have a strong desire to make a difference at work but I am hanging onto the belief that me+trust in God+spending time with God is going to have a more positive effect on everything in my life (including my job) than just me+workaholism.

There are two scriptures in Psalms that every stressed out job worker, manager, or borderline workaholic should read. The first is in Psalm 127 verse 1 "Unless the LORD builds the house,they labor in vain who build it; unless the LORD guards the city, The watchman stays awake in vain." The second verse is right after that- Psalm 127 verse 2, "2 It is vain for you to rise up early, to sit up late, to eat the bread of sorrows; for so He gives His beloved sleep."

The scriptures above teach us that God is in control, he reigns over everything, and nothing can be done without his authority. If we have an idol of workaholism in our hearts this means we believe ourselves+work equals= progress, success, and a good life. So, we replace hard work+trust in God+a balanced life with work and sweat and this is an idol. We might mentally say to ourselves that of course we trust God with our job etc- but our behavior of killing ourselves and neglecting sleep, family time, and prayer say the exact opposite. I was doing some of this myself prior to this test and I am still not fully redeemed in this area.

The Alternative:
Here are a couple of scriptural alternatives you can just read-- I have to run and get ready for work. If you read these scriptures and make a life-change to put God first you are saying that you believe God will act and support you because you trusted Him.
#1) Matthew 6 verses 31-33 "Therefore do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For after all these things the Gentiles seek. For your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you."
#2) Psalm 37 verse 4 "Delight yourself also in the LORD, and He shall give you the desires of your heart.

Last thing... the Psalm of the day today was Psalm 65, it was awesome, I just ran out of time to write about it. It has a neat tie-in with how God does bless his people. It confirms the positive LONG-TERM side of everything I am seeking to prove in my "Put God First Test". Its encouraging you should read it. Here is a direct link if it is easier for you. http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=ps%2065&version=NKJV

Let's GO God --- we have much to accomplish at work today. Please bless my Web project I've had next to no time to work on!!

All scriptures quoted in the New King James Version (NKJV) of the Bible which is Copyrighted by Thomas Nelson. Scriptures obtained from www.biblegateway.com

"Put God First Test" - Day #19 - "God is active"

2011-06-01T07:26:00.002-05:00

I am in an experiment to show (myself primarily) that a person can put God first, seek first his kingdom, and spend time with God daily. The experiment seeks to show that if a person does put God first then not only will a crazy job and life not fall apart- it will thrive.

Lord, I dedicate this morning time with you- to you. Please help me to draw near to you.

Bible Passage:
Psalm 64 - this is what spoke to me in my Psalm of the day -
1 Hear my voice, O God, in my meditation;
         Preserve my life from fear of the enemy.
2 Hide me from the secret plots of the wicked,
         From the rebellion of the workers of iniquity,
3 Who sharpen their tongue like a sword,
         And bend their bows to shoot their arrows—bitter words,
4 That they may shoot in secret at the blameless;
         Suddenly they shoot at him and do not fear.
....
⁷ But God shall shoot at them with an arrow;
         Suddenly they shall be wounded.
⁸ So He will make them stumble over their own tongue;
         All who see them shall flee away.
⁹ All men shall fear,
         And shall declare the work of God;
         For they shall wisely consider His doing.
¹⁰ The righteous shall be glad in the LORD, and trust in Him.
         And all the upright in heart shall glory.(NKJV)

People say a lot of mean things behind the backs of others. It hurts when we find out words that have been said about us. Once again the Psalmist David, who was such a strong man of faith in God, shares a plaguing concern and anxiety he has- about the backstabbing words of others. You can see that nothing has changed in 3,000 years- people are still cruel and disloyal to each other. In spite of the fact that David's faith was so strong he still experienced these same people attacks that we all do- no one is immune.

David learned through experience that God is active and monitors the actions of those who shoot arrows (back-stab with evil words) and punishes them. He says that God will make them stumble over their own tongue. It goes on to say "all men shall fear"- so this retribution is done publicly as an example to the back-stabber and everyone involved in the situation.

This lesson really shows a few things. First of all, don't talk about people behind their backs unless it is something that builds them up. If you do- just know God is active in monitoring what you're doing and he will eventually punish you in the same way you are treating others. The second lesson I get from this is not to worry about what is said behind my back because God will handle it. There is no point in me getting unsettled in my mind about what someone might be saying. The last point I'll make is that in the last verse, again, we're told that the way God will handle the people who do this will make the righteous glad- and help them to trust in him more. Its easy to forget that we go through these times with a purpose that ultimately will help us. We will be glad in the end and by seeing the Lord work we will trust in him more. Ultimately it would do us a lot of good if we could just remember to not fret during times like these but to pray- and then trust God no matter what people are saying or doing.

For more reinforcement and encouragement on this topic today go read my favorite Psalm- 37 - it will help you if you are going through a time like this. You can look up Psalm 37 at www.biblegateway.com.

Let's GO God!

All scriptures quoted in the New King James Version (NKJV) of the Bible which is Copyrighted by Thomas Nelson. Scriptures obtained from www.biblegateway.com

"Put God First Test" - Day #18 - "Springs in the Desert"

2011-05-31T07:34:00.000-05:00

I am in an experiment to show (myself primarily) that a person can put God first, seek first his kingdom, and spend time with God daily. The experiment seeks to show that if a person does put God first then not only will a crazy job and life not fall apart- it will thrive.

Bible Passage:
Psalm 63 - this is what spoke to me in my Psalm of the day:
¹ O God, You are my God;
         Early will I seek You;
         My soul thirsts for You;
         My flesh longs for You
         In a dry and thirsty land
         Where there is no water.
² So I have looked for You in the sanctuary,
         To see Your power and Your glory.(NKJV)

Psalm 63 was really good today- I recommend reading the whole thing. I pulled out verse 1 and 2 to focus on today. The Psalm starts off with a prayer to God. David is apparently in the wilderness of Judah at this time avoiding capture and death by the jealous King of Israel whose name was King Saul. David starts off talking about seeking God early but then he goes right into being thirsty. No doubt David had no problem understanding thirst while being in the wilderness!

Thirst was a good description for David at that time of his desire for more of God. David noted that although he desired the water that came from God - it was not to be found in the land. I think sometimes we stay in the wilderness of this world where there is no life-giving water of God and we are puzzled why we are dry in our prayer life and in our walk with God. We are thirsty for Him but we can't get any water - we can't seem to feel close to God or hear from God.

David was thirsty for God too- he notes in verse 2 that since he was thirsty for God he went and looked for God "in the sanctuary". Certainly the sanctuary David had available to him when hiding from his enemies in the wilderness might have simply been a cave where he could pray, worship the Lord, and pull out a scroll of the Old Testament he could read.

We too have to create a sanctuary- we have to be intentional. We have to go where the life is. We can't continue to live in this world and fill our cups with the dry dust of this world's dead streams and expect our thirst for God to be quenched. Do we want the clear, cold, splashy life that comes from the presence of God? We must go to where He is- in the sanctuary!

In this Psalm David was in a difficult place to seek the Lord. He was hiding from King Saul, probably on the move a great deal, and under stress. David chose to stop in the middle of that time, early in the morning it said in verse 1, and put God first. He created a sanctuary of prayer and seeking somewhere... then in that dry and thirsty land... the refreshing, cold springs of God's presence arose out of nowhere.

You are thirsty for God but you are very busy, believe me I understand that. Architect a lifestyle to allow time for prayer and his Word. When you do, you too will find that the clear, cold, life-giving springs of God's presence will come wash you, fill you, and refresh you.

Let's GO together today God! Help us!

All scriptures quoted in the New King James Version (NKJV) of the Bible which is Copyrighted by Thomas Nelson. Scriptures obtained from www.biblegateway.com

"Put God First Test" - Day #17 - "There is a secret"

2011-05-30T18:20:00.004-05:00

I am in an experiment to show (myself primarily) that a person can put God first, seek first his kingdom, and spend time with God daily. The experiment seeks to show that if a person does put God first then not only will a crazy job and life not fall apart- it will thrive.

You might be seeking the Lord, trying to pray, and say, "its not working". You might say, "its dry", "I am distracted", or "He isn't saying anything". The Lord is actually allowing ME to go through this right now, to remind me of a lesson He taught me some time ago. The lesson is that when you seek the Lord and try to have a regular prayer time- or even if you try to have a time of prayer for the first time- there may be difficulty in doing it. The difficulty may be that it seems God is not there. The challenge or hardship of it may be that perhaps you don't feel worthy. The problem you may run into is that you have an active mind, a lot of worries, many cares, and many and various thoughts that run through your mind when you try to get quiet and still in order to pray.

I am having some of the above happen to me today as I try to seek the Lord and spend time with him. I'm glad I am going through this so I can share with you a couple of really important secrets. (there are more than these but here's two- and I certainly don't have all of the secrets!)

Difficulties In Seeking The Lord And Praying- Secret #1:
You do not know what is going on when you try to pray- your perception is incredibly limited- this is true for all of us. You cannot see invisible things and the Lord will not show you every single thing that is going on behind the scenes- or that He is working on inside of you. You couldn't handle it if God showed you everything. Your job is to do exactly what you are doing- show up and try to pray. Get in there and try to spend time with God. Do it unconditionally. Do it if you fail. Do it if you don't feel worthy. Do it if you feel ridiculous. Do it if you are distracted. Do it if you experience opposition. Try to meet with the Lord in prayer no matter what.

The real heart of the first secret is that God is working good things even when you cannot tell. The secret is that its your job to come to him. You are not being rejected because, in your judgement, you are coming to him and doing a "bad job" of it. The secret is that you CAME TO HIM. This is a mystery. The great and awesome miracle is that you did come- and in spite of the fact that you may not have done very well (like me today), he was still there. Things were done on the inside of you as you prayed- that you cannot feel, see, or understand yet. Your job is to come to the Lord and seek him. Remember that your development is actually God's job -though you have a role. The Apostle Paul told the Philippians that it is God who works in us both to have the desire to serve God- and then to help us do the work of serving God.

Difficulties In Seeking The Lord And Praying- Secret #2:
The second secret I want to cover is that when you seek the Lord its NEVER without effect. I have a saying I'll share with you, "No time spent with the Lord is useless". You cannot come into the presence of God when seeking Him- and not be changed.

It DID work. Keep pushing.

Let's GO God!

"Put God First Test" - Day #16 - "Slippage"

2011-05-29T23:42:00.001-05:00

It didn't mean anything at the time

2011-05-28T22:54:00.001-05:00

In today's devotional time my Psalm of the day didn't really speak to me. I like it when what I read addresses something I am dealing with. I fought with my Psalm today and struggled to read it over and over - trying to get something out of it. Ultimately it was mostly a non-starter and it didn't mean anything at the time...

Well, I had something interesting happen - I came home this evening to open up that Psalm to the family to read it to them before bedtime- and 3-4 verses truly spoke to me. I explained the tie-in of what I was reading to our present circumstances to my wife and she got it too. It led to a short discussion around the challenge we faced today with my oldest daughter and the two of us. Pretty neat.

So, although my Psalm really meant nothing to me this morning- tonight it was like light poured out of the Psalms... a light to our path. Encouraging.

The lesson I take from what happened here is this. My job is to come to the Lord, seek Him, spend time with Him- and yes read His Word as part of that time of seeking. And like so many other areas of this spiritual life- I should not hold the Lord to my expectation of what "should" happen in a quiet time or when reading the Word. His timing is perfect- His application of His Word is also perfect.

I should have trusted the Lord. I should have come to the Lord in trust, spent time with Him, and left the results to Him- glad I learned this lesson (again) tonight.

"Put God First Test" - Day #15 - "This is for you"

2011-05-28T12:34:00.002-05:00

"Put God First Test" - Day #14 - "If I have to work"

2011-05-27T23:57:00.051-05:00

I am in an experiment to show (myself primarily) that a person can put God first, seek first his kingdom, and spend time with God daily. The experiment seeks to show that if a person does put God first then not only will a crazy job and life not fall apart- it will thrive.

I am blogging quite late tonight- not quite reflective of my recent go to bed early/wake early to pray strategy. I had a lot of things to get done this evening after a busy day off around the house getting things done. I need to make sure I still wake up at a good time in the morning to pray- and keep this habit up!

I have a statement I have been making lately to people which is this: "The world is such a mess and there are so many people who need help. I would rather be out on the mission field or something than having a job but if I have to work at a job- I want to make a difference."

The thought process is that I don't want to just come in and punch a clock. I want to come in every day and challenge myself to change things- and make a difference. I don't find that the Lord is passive about my job either. I am constantly inspired by him to make a difference, work hard, help people, and try to push forward.

I have a motto I've been saying since 2004 in my job which is "Everything we do will work". The genesis of this motto was in a sales meeting I was having around June 2004. I was encouraging my sales team as our division of our company was in the process of being acquired. I told them something like this, "Folks, we have been through a lot together and we've learned to work hard, be creative, and try a lot of different things. I can honestly say 'Everything we do will work' in this new company just as it has for us up to this point.

That motto has carried me for 7 years of sales management now and I use it a lot. The idea is that sales people, business people, and really anyone should try a lot of things and have the attitude that all of those things are going to work. If you work hard and do your best and believe things are going to work- you will have a very solid opportunity for many of your ideas, projects, and tasks to be successful. Attitude is so important and people who really buy into "Everything we do will work"- have good outcomes. I am so proud of people who are proactive, positive, and persistent- and they become successful.

Bible Passage:
Psalm 59 - this is what I learned from my Psalm of the day:
1 Deliver me from my enemies, O my God;
         Defend me from those who rise up against me.
2 Deliver me from the workers of iniquity,
         And save me from bloodthirsty men.
3 For look, they lie in wait for my life;
         The mighty gather against me,
         Not for my transgression nor for my sin, O LORD.
4 They run and prepare themselves through no fault of mine.

David was a strong man of God but look- for days in a row now the Psalms he wrote have been about extreme conflict and stress. I thought my blog post a couple of days ago "Wrestling for my life" was TOO transparent but look at this excerpt from the Psalm of the day- I feel totally normal! The serious Christian life certainly does have a lot of trial and conflict but the Lord is with us in all of it and he answers prayer! You will notice what David does to ... he leans on God, comes to God, and prays to God. He even COMPLAINS to God- I've done that before. I've gone somewhere private and complained about people or situations before. I don't want to gossip or back-stab someone who is unkind, rude, or anything else negative- but I need to get it off my chest. Talking to God about these things is totally ok - and he may give you compassion for those people when you come to him like that so you can pray for them.

"Put God First Test" - Day #13 - "The Gentleness of God"

2011-05-26T07:35:00.001-05:00

Wrestling for my life

2011-05-25T23:10:00.001-05:00

I have some issues I have really struggled with in life. Some of those things I have blogged about- why the heck blog about them? Well, I don't want to shock or embarrass anyone(including myself) but my belief is other people might be dealing with some of the same things- so maybe sharing could be helpful?

I actually wrestle all the time with "should I blog", "do I let people know about the blog", or "why am I truly blogging"- but each time I pray and ask the Lord if my heart is in the right place I seem to receive encouragement. The other day I prayed about this very topic and maybe an hour later my friend David emailed me to "keep the faith" in an email after reading a blog story(thanks David).

The example I just gave above is simply one sample of the kinds of internal conversations and personal challenges I wrestle with. As you can see from the above there is a mental "conversation" going on that I have to deal with about blogging or not blogging (obviously I settled on blogging).....there are many such inner conversations and struggles I deal with. (TOO transparent??)

There are plenty of other anxieties, conflicts and insecurities I deal with at various times. Oftentimes these spring from people interactions but they don't necessarily have to. Quite often these negative feelings or mental-emotional struggles are based on a misunderstanding or something I should either forgive or blow off. I wish I could do that- many people can. I can't typically. At other times I'll wrestle with an anxiety or an inner-wound which is all over me without a good reason. I suffer a lot when I go through one of these situations. The way my personality works I am very psycho-analytical so I tend to be very honest and critical about myself. My own thoughts accuse me a lot. I hate it because many of the things that literally "own" me in my mind and that I wrestle with greatly are vague- there isn't a lot of basis for them but I deal with them as if they were.

This part of my life I am describing is among the least flattering things I could share- I am not relishing this and I am holding back some. This is the best I can do.

From reading this so far you can maybe get some idea that I really, really wrestle sometimes with painful and challenging thought patterns. How is it that I deal with this- THAT is the only reason this too-transparent topic is worth sharing. First I will give you a basic idea- then I will give you an example.

So, the basic idea with dealing with these mental wrestlings whether they be: hurt feelings, jealousy, insecurity, unforgiveness, doubt, or lust is to bring them to God. Whether I am at work, driving in my car, or cleaning up after dinner - whenever and wherever a flood of these painful dark thoughts hit me my immediate reaction is to call on God. The mental anguish can be pretty severe and my prayers are not pretty nor are they complex- they are a simple call for help.

I remember a movie about Vietnam in which the U.S. Army was pinned down by the Viet Cong on all sides. The radio operator called down air support directly on their own position. A short time later airplanes rained down bombs directly on and around the camp of the U.S. troops- it was a painful way of destroying the enemy but it worked. You can picture me like a radio operator in combat urgently yelling for direct air support. I'm in a battle I can't win - and I'm calling for air support from the Lord.

I wish I could tell you some awesome, spiritual techniques I have for fighting these issues- and I really do think the mind is the main battlefield in life. I don't- I have no techniques to fight this. All I know how to do is call upon the Lord.

Before I get into an example story (from tonight) here is a quick tip- this stuff is absolutely spiritual warfare. This means the enemy of our souls comes to torment us- he hunts us and his favorite weapons work from the inside - in our thoughts. If you have something that has often plagued you...please DO recognize that this stuff has some roots probably in real issues but the enemy also comes to bind us and hurt us with these things.

So, the story tonight has to do with a couple of hours of mental wrestlings I was dealing with this evening. The issues were definitely spawned by human interactions. I wanted to forgive- I promise you that. I wanted to "just get over it" as some people can do so easily it seems. I had the best of intentions but these several issues would not just fade away. The more I wrestled with reasoning and my own mental exertion- the more painful the issues were becoming. All of this really happened no more than 3 hours ago. I was actually at home so I was able to go hide in my room for a few minutes and my intention was to go and pray for help. (call for air support you might say) Tonight I went into the room, closed the door, and I went to pray-- and the second I was with the Lord I couldn't remember the issues I had. The anxiety, frustration, and insecurity I was dealing with- I forgot. I wanted to pray about them so I could know I had dedicated the issues to God but I could only remember one of them. Literally I was free the moment I was in prayer. Clearly the enemy was behind part of the issue this evening (although I can say there were some real issues as well) because when I went to call upon the Lord- they fled.

This is a great example of the fact that I DON'T have spiritual strength, ideas, or tricks - all I did is come to God trusting in him. (trust is also called "faith") I will tell you that attacks of lust, pride, fear, anxiety, worry, jealousy, envy, unforgiveness, or a wounded spirit seem to not cease and they don't get easier. However, I do find that as I call upon God, every time, he sets me free, gives me the victory, and heals me. You would think from reading all of this that I have a painful life- I'm not going to deny that there is pain. However, I live a miraculous life- and I stand constantly amazed by the grace, love, and hope that I am given by God. After having had a pattern of calling upon God for awhile its kind of a habit to turn to him pretty quickly in a painful trial of various kinds-- and I want to tell you that in life we turn to what works. God works. He never lets me go, he never lets me down, and there is never a painful trial- no matter how deep the temptation or hurt that he will not help me with. Sometimes I am so overwhelmed that I am confused and I can't even think straight- in those times I'll just say something like "Lord, I don't know what to do"- and he'll give me an idea or a way out.

What if I could tell you that no matter how painful your life, your thoughts, your past, or your temptations - that Jesus Christ can put those things under your feet and you will crush them.

I probably have a battle like this one that I shared with you at least a few times per week (if not more)- the way the Lord deals with each one is different and I never know how he will set me free- but he always does. Its amazing. Its so hard to go through but the lesson of going through it and learning that he'll set you free every time is absolutely unbelievable. As you start to bring each and every situation to God you may suffer- but eventually you'll sometimes laugh as you're suffering as you remember the Lord is coming-- not "maybe" ... he's already on the way. What if your life was meant to be free but it was still painful- would you take it? What if the pain had a point- and what if each trial taught you, humbled you, and brought you closer to the Lord? The greatest thing is the Lord helps me without judging- I may indeed "buy-in" to thoughts of unforgiveness, lust, envy, or whatever the case may be- so part of my cry for help in those case becomes, "I'm so sorry- please help me". He NEVER judges me, I never feel condemned when I bring these things to him- and that is a true miracle because I DO condemn myself. But when I come into prayer all of that eventually goes away- and in the Lord's timing (whether that be immediate or hours), he sets me free. There are no conditions on this freedom like "He will only set you free if the thoughts or whatever wasn't your fault"- NO, plenty of times it was my fault.

Not to beat this into the ground but the point is to come to him in simple dependence- and yes of course repentance if that is needed for the situation. Let me assure you his help will always come- and it will never be with rejection. After years and years of this I still expect rejection from him when I come to him in prayer during a tough season- I get nothing but acceptance, grace, fellowship, and yes- freedom.

The way I call upon the Lord is very child-like and often desperate- anyone can do this- there is no trick. You can start calling upon God.

Chasing God is the most fulfilling life you could ever live.

P.S. - if you want me to write more on the topic of freedom and wrestling let me know by commenting.

"Put God First Test" - Day #12 - "Battle Stories"

2011-05-25T07:54:00.001-05:00

I am in an experiment to show (myself primarily) that a person can put God first, seek first his kingdom, and spend time with God daily. The experiment seeks to show that if a person does put God first then not only will a crazy job and life not fall apart- it will thrive.

Bible Passage:
There is a story in the Old Testament of the Bible in 1st Kings Chapter 20 that I love in which the Syrians are coming against the people of Israel. Ahab is King of Israel. He is not a king who follows God but God, in his care for Israel, still sends a prophet who tells Ahab they will defeat Syria. Ahab did not seek God's help- but God still made this promise. The Israelites did defeat Syria in battle and the finale of the story is exciting: "Now the children of Israel encamped before them like two little flocks of goats, while the Syrians filled the countryside. Then a man of God came and spoke to the king of Israel, and said, “Thus says the LORD: ‘Because the Syrians have said, “The LORD is God of the hills, but He is not God of the valleys,” therefore I will deliver all this great multitude into your hand, and you shall know that I am the LORD.’” And they encamped opposite each other for seven days. So it was that on the seventh day the battle was joined; and the children of Israel killed one hundred thousand foot soldiers of the Syrians in one day. But the rest fled to Aphek, into the city; then a wall fell on twenty-seven thousand of the men who were left."(1 Kings 20:1-20 NKJV)

This story of God's defense of his people has inspired me for years and it speaks so loudly to me the simple truth that God wants us to know he is not just a God of one situation. He is not strong in only one part of life. God does not become uninvolved in a certain type of circumstance. God is active, powerful, involved- and it does not honor God for us to say or to think God cannot or will-not help in a certain situation.

Think of that. God gave us this story to perfectly illustrate the fact that we should rely on him for all situations in life. We should involve him in all situations in life. And we should trust him in every part of our life. In fact it displeases God, as we saw in the story, when people think he is not all-powerful.

We also see a test of God in this story. The Syrians didn't know it but they tested God. In their case the God test was negative- they believed less about God than was true. They believed Israel could not rely on God in new areas (the Plains).

What do you believe about God? Is God confined to a prayer before you fall to sleep? Is God confined to rituals? Do you only get involved with God at church? What if you did a test? Lets say God right now is someone you admire or love but you don't engage him much in life. Why not ask God to get involved in something you are doing?

Let's GO God!

Scriptures are in the New King James Version of the Bible (NKJV). Scripture provided by BibleGateway.com. NKJV is Copyrighted by Thomas Nelson

"Put God First Test" - Day #11 - "A Key Life Resource"

2011-05-24T07:39:00.006-05:00

I am in the midst of a test in which I spend time with God each day and I don't work into the wee hours of the night for my job anymore in order to stay caught up. I am in an experiment to show (myself primarily) that a person can put God first, seek first his kingdom, and spend time with God daily. The experiment seeks to show that if a person does put God first then not only will a crazy job and life not fall apart- it will thrive.

Wow am I hurting today. My oldest daughter got so hurt by a friend. It hurts so much worse when its your child and not yourself. I don't have anything to say about this other than that I prayed for her and I am trusting the Lord with her.

I found out yesterday on a customer call that I am losing a pretty good sized account. We were not made aware by the customer of some areas of dissatisfaction they had. Our competitor also has a feature the customer likes and the new VP used to use that competitor. I tried everything I knew- to no avail.

So, yesterday was pretty hard in some ways, there were good things too however- it didn't all just go one way. I am trusting God in the midst of the situation- I am leaning on him even as these trials happen.

With those who have been saved by Jesus Christ and walk in him we have resources that the world cannot understand. Trials still happen, temptations still happen, personal failings, and conflicts still happen but the beautiful thing is we have many key resources that are available to us even if we may be overwhelmed by the situation. I only have time to cover one of those resources this morning.

A Key Life Resource:
There are powerful spiritual and practical lessons we are given in the midst of darkness, conflict, or storm that come to us through reading the Bible. The Lord will actively illuminate the words on the page of our Bibles if we will read them- this is one of the key ways he speaks to his people, helps them, and guides them. We should really read the Bible every day and not just during a difficult time much like we wouldn't only eat a meal during a tough time - but on a regular basis so we can live and have strength.

There are many ways the Lord speaks to us when we read the word. When we are reading the Word we may notice a verse - it may catch our eye in some way. When we are reading something might speak very similarly to something we are going through. Or, when we are reading it- the teaching may give us just the right way of handling a current situation.

Its amazing how I will read the Word of God when I have a need and how he will speak to me through Bible reading. I encourage you to try this. In fact I noticed that my Psalm of the day speaks to some of the hurt my family and I are dealing with today--- its no surprise its the norm. Don't be robbed of this blessing- get in the Bible daily yourself and trust God to speak to you. God speaks quite often to us when we read the Bible- go enjoy the blessing!

Bible Passage:
8 You number my wanderings;
Put my tears into Your bottle;
Are they not in Your book?(NKJV)

Well, with the difficulties of yesterday- you can see the Lord had some quite kind encouragement for us today. I love you God.

Go enjoy the Bible and the Lord will bless, help, and speak to your situation too. Lets GO God.

Scriptures provided by Biblegateway.com and the New King James Version of the Bible is Copyrighted by Thomas Nelson. Thanks guys!

Daily Blogging for my "Put God First Test" - Day #10 - "It Doesn't Matter What Conflict"

2011-05-23T07:04:00.004-05:00

Firing invisible arrows at someone's dragons ..

2011-05-22T22:20:00.005-05:00

Sometimes I see someone with a situation in their life that could lead to pain or loss and I don't know what to do. Sometimes I know someone is hurting themselves but for various reasons I cannot speak to them. If the situation were life-threatening I'd have to step in but these are problems like relational issues, immoral living, depression, need of direction, bondages, rebellion, job issues, etc.

Oftentimes I cannot speak to the person because I know the person cannot receive advice, I don't know them very well, or it might be inappropriate to speak to them.

From time to time when I become aware of someone like this - who needs help and may or may not know that they need help - I feel a strong sadness mixed with concern and a sense of responsibility for them. These feelings can go on for hours or days for a person. Its clear there is absolutely nothing I can do for these people but I can't stop worrying about them. This is a very difficult feeling and burden. The toughest part of it is that I like to fix things- and I just can't fix these people.

Sometimes I have these burdens about issues in the world such as the lack of religious freedom and starvation in North Korea, child @ trafficking in Cambodia and elsewhere, or the waves of change trying to change the definition of marriage in the United States. Other times I have this sense of burden and fear for someone's well-being who I might know - even if I only vaguely know them or know about them from hearing a story of their challenge.

During these times I will find myself talking about the person or the issue with my wife or perhaps a friend as I try to vent this worry and concern- it doesn't work at all...

A few times I've had the idea to pray and fast for a person going through something although I can't remember if I've fasted and prayed for a broad-sweeping world issue. I have to tell you that the times I've really focused in fasting and prayer for people and taken on their issue personally- the Lord has really come through. The answer hasn't always been in a day or an hour but looking back I now see a lot of freedom has come through those times. I actually hate to fast- until I am doing it. Once I get into one (I don't fast for several days and I use a protein shake... I have a job so a basic protein shake helps) I end up loving the worship and prayer time and its amazing how close you can feel to the Lord during these times.

I am still waiting for some of the answers to prayer or prayer with fasting but many other answers are clear and visible now. In either case its such a gift to be able to pray for someone. Its such an amazing thing to fire invisible arrows that slay people's dragons. I know it pleases God to have our fellowship as he works in people's lives.

What I'd like to challenge YOU with is this. Do you ever find yourself worried about someone? Do you get angry when you see someone hurting themselves or others? Do you feel a dread and wish you could do something-- but you know you can't walk in their shoes for them? Let me ask you this - do you sometimes have a clear idea of what is going to happen if someone keeps heading down a certain wrong path? What do you do about this? Do you find yourself gossiping about them? Do you find yourself maybe expressing passive aggressive behavior toward them because you get mad at what you see? Do you nag someone because you see so clearly their mistakes? Do you ever find yourself lashing out at someone because you can't believe they won't listen to your advice?

I want to challenge you with the following- it may be that the Lord has ASSIGNED that person to you for intercession. Do you ever wonder why you notice the path they are on is wrong when you don't have those same feelings about anyone else? Do you ever wonder why your insight into their current choices is so clear? Do you think its a coincidence that you are worried about them? Or do you think *maybe* the Lord is giving you a glimpse of what he sees so you can pray? Do you think maybe this could be His whispering and you just haven't recognized up to now that its His voice?

Stop and consider the possibility that when you have these feelings- it may be the Holy Spirit giving you an intercessory prayer assignment.

I have a secret.. I was not going to blog about this. I am worried right now about someone. The blog was going to be about how its so hard when you don't know how to help someone. I was writing about this and mid-way through the blog entry I suddenly realized a several-year pattern I've had in which I worry about someone, feel responsible for them, and pray for them (maybe fast for them, maybe just pray). I had quite a WOW moment tonight. I hope it helps you- it really gave me such a sense of purpose and participation to know that the Lord was giving me a prayer assignment. By the way- want to know how I know that sometimes we can express a prayer assignment through lashing out in fleshly ways- I did that tonight. I was so frustrated about this person obviously hurting themselves- so worried about them.

My 30-Day "Put God First Test" - Day #9 - God Hears & Answers

2011-05-22T11:49:00.003-05:00

What is this? I was working so much for my job- my time with God was lacking. I am in the midst of a test in which I spend time with God each day and I don't work into the wee hours for my job anymore. I am in an experiment to show (myself primarily) that a person can put God first, seek first his kingdom, and spend time with God daily. The experiment seeks to show that if a person does put God first then not only will a crazy job and life not fall apart- it will thrive.

Bible Passage:
Psalm 54 - this is what spoke to me in my Psalm of the day:
1 Save me, O God, by Your name,
And vindicate me by Your strength.
2 Hear my prayer, O God;
Give ear to the words of my mouth.
3 For strangers have risen up against me,
And oppressors have sought after my life;
They have not set God before them. Selah
4 Behold, God is my helper;
The Lord is with those who uphold my life.
5 He will repay my enemies for their evil.
Cut them off in Your truth.
6 I will freely sacrifice to You;
I will praise Your name, O LORD, for it is good.
7 For He has delivered me out of all trouble;
And my eye has seen its desire upon my enemies.(NKJV)

This passage is so encouraging because I've found it to be true in my life. The Psalm starts off with the writer praying to God to save him from some serious conflict. He asks God to hear his prayer. He tells God people are against him and want to kill him and he barely finishes describing the problem- and he is already saying he has had a revelation that God is his helper. He then praises God for the answer to his prayer, his rescue, and his vindication because he has received assurance during prayer and worship God will save him. This Psalm teaches a great pattern about coming to God for help- and receiving help.

God Hears - But Will WE Believe?
God DOES hear our prayers- our actual words go into his ears(v2). We need to remember this. Sometimes when we pray we might feel as if our words bounce off the ceiling but this is a spiritual life. Words don't stop at the ceiling when spoken to God. As Christians we need to take a step back and stop judging spiritual results with physical perceptions. We need to stop allowing trust in God to be governed by what we see or feel. We do have a rich physical life of perceptions, thoughts, smells, tastes, and sounds - and those things are oftentimes wonderful and compelling but they don't totally define who we are. Those things do not totally define everything for us as Christians.

We come to faith in Christ as a decision - our ongoing relationship with him and growth in him is by faith and decision as well. So, when we have a need we need to come to God, believing he hears us, and believing he will answer- again its a decision not a feeling. Pray, then trust.. NOT pray, then see how you feel. Pray. Wait. Thank Him.

Be Encouraged - Pray, Then Wait!
In Psalm 54 above, the ancient hero of Israel-David, was in serious distress due to REAL human conflict. In fact, people were trying to kill him. We know from his life that he had long seasons of his life in which he was chased with the sword and spear by many enemies. Isn't it interesting that he did not talk about his plans to rally the troops or physically defend himself? Isn't it interesting there is not all kinds of foul language and angry cursing going on? Isn't it interesting that the author did not turn to humans for help and for revenge and talk about his war strategy? What DID he do? He prayed.

How interesting it is that someone whose life was on the line turned to something invisible to save them? David appealed to God for help and real-world results. And we find out at the end of the Psalm that it worked. Be encouraged- God can hear your prayers, he is listening, and although he is invisible- he can defeat whatever conflicts or problems you have. You don't have to go take revenge for yourself or go fight someone. You don't need to scheme or worry. You don't need to curse people or take matters into your own hands. PRAY ABOUT YOUR NEEDS AND CONFLICTS. Pray for help and you will receive help. We come to Christ in faith - as a choice. Continue on in faith- and maintain trust in God.

Trust in the invisible God and do not waver no matter how you feel or what you see. Hang on to him. Cling to him and do not give up. If you are weak in faith it doesn't matter- just cling to him for his help and never stop trusting in him. Pray, then wait.

Prayer & Thanksgiving:
* Thank you Lord for this day, Sunday, a day to disconnect and rest.
* Thank you Lord for such a powerful Psalm today.
* Thank you for this wonderful missions party we get to attend today, help it to make a difference!
* Thank you for granting me this time with you today.
* Thank you for our many blessings.
* Thank you for helping me overcome my personality faults and weaknesses.
* Thank you for answering all of my prayers.
* Thank you for being so present in our lives.
* Thank you for my family.
* Thank you for causing one of my new sites to be indexed by Google as I asked in prayer.
* Thank you for saving the "T" account I asked you to help us save.

Meditation & Listening:
Things that seem to bring a bad reputation on the Church actually only purify the Church. No harm can come to the real Church. The gates of hell will not prevail against the Church. (by the way history with its wide-angle lens has really shown this to be true)

Prayer Requests:
* Lord, please heal little "M" at my daughter's school- totally. We wait and thank you.
* Lord, thank you for saving "DM" 's life - now restore him and his family. Cause them to walk in faith in Christ and in fellowship with one another. Provide full restoration in all relationships and - provide a full physical healing as well.
* Lord, heal "A" - of cancer and provide a spiritual full assurance of salvation.
* Lord, protect my kids from bad influences in friendships and media- raise up good Christian friendships for them (lifelong), good Christian examples, and godly spouses for them.
* Lord, bless our school and help them with fund-raising to get into their new building. Keep the school pure and on-track in every way.
* Bless our church and keep it pure and on-track in every way. Help us to be a positive influence at church as well.
* Lord, please bless our Web project we have had so little time to work on. Bless our traffic. Help us to fix our remaining bugs in the new area of the site. Please help us with this and bless it.
* Lord, bless our jobs- and make us a blessing.
* Lord, bless our marriage and family with strength, purity, health, love, and a life of prayer.
* Lord, please protect the family and traditional marriage in the United States.

Scriptures obtained from Bible Gateway. NKJV of the Bible is Copyrighted by Thomas Nelson.

My 30-Day "Put God First Test" - Day #8 - Any Who SEEK God?

2011-05-21T10:16:00.001-05:00

My 30-Day "Put God First Test" is an experiment. I was working so much for my job that it was keeping me up late into the night most nights. It was exhausting and it was taking all of my time with the Lord. So I have decided to stay diligent at work but stop working late into the night so I can get up early and spend time with the Lord daily. So no matter how loud my job is screaming I'll spend time with God and seek him- trusting that he will help and bless my job. My relationship with the Lord is too important to neglect.

First test week findings:
1.) I really enjoyed spending time with the Lord, I'm still tweaking the morning scheduling.
2.) It was nice to purposely be trusting God with my business in a sacrificial way that honored him and involved him.
3.) No disasters happened at work from me not working until the wee hours of the night.
4.) I'm not as caught up as I'd like to be but I did have some remarkably successful customer calls where things went in our direction - I believe 4 of them.
5.) I had only a little time to work on my Web Project but did fix a couple of problems- traffic on that site is still very low.
6.) Overall I have a great sense of peace, confidence, and partnership with the Lord and I know I am on the right track. One week is not enough to make a judgment about this but even with a week I find this to be something that is making changes in me, helping me some in business, and helping me to be close to God.

Bible Passage:
Psalm 53 - this is what spoke to me in my Psalm of the day:

2 God looks down from heaven upon the children of men,
To see if there are any who understand, who seek God.(NKJV)

You can clearly see from verse 2 above that God is searching for people to seek him. God wants you and me. He desires you and me. He is searching to see if anyone understands- who seek God. Apparently it takes understanding to know its crucial to seek God. Lets pray for understanding-- and lets take the time to seek God!

Let's GO God!

Scriptures obtained from Bible Gateway. NKJV of the Bible is Copyrighted by Thomas Nelson.

Daily Blogging for my "Put God First Test" - Day #7 - EVIDENCE?

2011-05-20T07:37:00.001-05:00

What is this? An experiment. I was so busy in job and life - that my time with the Lord was lacking. This is a life-test of spending time with the Lord daily for 30 days - a "Put God First Test". Its a test that by putting him first in my life and prioritizing time with him... I am trusting him to help me with the rest. The test is not simply that my job and life will survive with me not working the crazy hours I had been working into the wee hours of the night. The test is that the Lord will greatly help me really flourish because I still work hard- but seek God daily and put him first in my priorities and time. I am blogging daily during this test...

Test Status:
I had some evidence of the Lord helping me yesterday on two customer sales calls that could have been difficult. One potential customer satisfaction issue and one contract negotiation- both went quite well and I felt I had favor with the customers. Also, a friend of mine at work said I had no idea how the Lord was using me- he'll tell me the details later. I had just prayed, if you recall yesterday's blog, for the Lord to use me etc. Go God!

About Evidence...
I talked about "evidence" just above.. as Christians we do enjoy seeing evidence things are going well as we obey the Lord but the life of walking with the Lord is not about requiring external evidence before we will obey the Lord. The life of the serious Christian (a "disciple") is about trusting before we see any result. Its about obeying the Lord even if everything is telling us there is no way its going to work out. We trust God that as we following him in areas like: seeking God, having honest business dealings, having purity of life, forgiveness, working hard, tithing, church attendance, or helping someone he will bless us in his way- and in his timing. He is faithful - he will eventually bless in a way we are able to see or understand but we obey out of love for him as a firm choice- no matter what the outcome.

The secret is when we trust without seeing and obey without any encouraging evidence we participate in God's work to shape us into his image. Continually trusting and obeying God over a long period of time does something to our character. When we trust God no matter what and obey what he says it leads to spiritual growth and strength.

When we trust God for long periods of time - it transforms us on the inside in life-changing ways.

Bible Passage:
Psalm 52 - this is what spoke to me in my daily Psalm:

8 But I am like a green olive tree in the house of God;
I trust in the mercy of God forever and ever.
9 I will praise You forever,
Because You have done it;
And in the presence of Your saints
I will wait on Your name, for it is good.(NKJV)

What spoke to me is that in the earlier verses before 8 and 9 in Psalm 52 it actually talks about how someone who doesn't make God his strength in life -but trusts himself is actually wicked-wow strong words! But the Psalm writer says in spite of how others may live- he is going to trust God forever - and it says later he will wait on the Name of the Lord. This is a great tie-in with what I was talking about above (no coincidences in life-thanks Lord). We trust God forever - we wait on him and just like this writer said he is like a green olive tree---- we too will be like a thriving "green olive tree" that will have fruit in our lives. The point? Trusting and waiting does eventually produce fruit.

Lets GO together God - we'll trust you no matter what!

Scriptures obtained from Bible Gateway. NKJV of the Bible is Copyrighted by Thomas Nelson.

30 Day Test - Day #6 "All are Welcome"

2011-05-19T07:36:00.002-05:00

What is this? An experiment. I am so busy and my time with the Lord was lacking. This is a test of spending time with the Lord faithfully for 30 days - the "Put God First Test". Its a test that by putting him first in my life and prioritizing time with him... he will help with the rest. I will blog daily during this test.

I made myself and my family available to the Lord today in prayer for whatever he has for us. I surrendered to any work, mission, or plan he has for us. Lord-use us for your will.

I was able to get the work project done yesterday that I was late for- in an unconventional way. I worked from home to allow the focus required for that project. Today and tomorrow are fairly packed days so it will be difficult to get the proactive thing done I wanted to get done- but you never know. I told the Lord again this morning that there are six reasons I am doing this test:
1.) I was working to the point of idolatry on my job to get things done and that is wrong.
2.) This test has to do with the belief that I can get more done by putting God first, in the long run, than taking it all upon myself.
3.) I didn't have a daily habit of seeking God and this is a habit I value and desire greatly.
4.) My children and wife need to see me seeking the Lord in order to firmly implant this in their lives.
5.) I want to be close to God.
6.) I want effective ministry to come from my life and my family's life- so I need effective seeking first.

There is someone floating around in my mind the past several days who I am upset with. It is no one who is reading this blog by the way- and not family. Its not a tremendously great reason that I am upset with them and they wouldn't particularly care if they found out anyway. I wear my respect on my sleeve a lot unfortunately- its just where I am at right now. What I need to do is forgive this person and treat them better than they treat me. What good is it if I say I am a Christian and I require good treatment in order to be kind to someone or forgive someone? I have repented to the Lord in prayer just now and I give myself permission to show grace, mercy, kindness, and forgiveness to this person- just as the Lord gave me those things before I knew I needed them or asked for them. This forgiveness journey, for me, is as hard- or harder- than the daily fight to be a pure man. Walking in forgiveness and living a life of unconditional love and grace is difficult for me- but if I turn my attention to this in prayer and practice I know the Lord can transform me in this area!

Bible Passage:
Psalm 51 - this is what spoke to me in my Psalm of the day:

1 Have mercy upon me, O God,
According to Your lovingkindness;
According to the multitude of Your tender mercies,
Blot out my transgressions.
2 Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity,
And cleanse me from my sin.
3 For I acknowledge my transgressions,
And my sin is always before me.
4 Against You, You only, have I sinned,
And done this evil in Your sight—
That You may be found just when You speak,
And blameless when You judge.(NKJV)

This entire chapter blessed and "fed" me this morning. It really came across with a lot of beauty and encouragement to me. Its so great that the Christian can come to God for forgiveness and restoration when we stumble. And its so amazing that the non-Christian is given the provision to be saved by simply coming to God through Christ. Really the passage above is a great model of humbling ourselves to the Lord and coming to him for his forgiveness and restoration at whatever state in life we are at.

I really want to share something with you that I have found which is amazing- I am a naturally self-critical person. I am very hard on myself. If I stumble and sin in some way I typically beat myself up a lot about it. But the amazing thing I'd like to tell you that I have discovered is when I come to the Lord and share with him what I have done, ask for his forgiveness, and ask for his help- I always have a great sense of peace and restoration. Or if I have grown cold in my walk, missed many devotional times, and am slipping and I come back to him- I come to him feeling condemned but I find a very welcoming sense of grace and restoration. What I am saying is this- the more I come to God in seeking and in prayer the more I am "SURPRISED", yes surprised. The more I need the Lord to help me in some area of failure or inadequacy - the more I am surprised at his kindness and gentleness. I come to him with my natural tendency to be self-condemned and he reverses me and shocks me with how loving he is when I do make the walk down that path toward him. What I mean is I think he's like me somehow- I think he is mad at me, disappointed in me, exasperated with me- like I am with myself. But because I don't want to leave the Lord I make myself come to him for forgiveness and repentance in spite of how I am feeling about life and about myself and when I do I not only do not feel condemned but I feel most welcome. I feel accepted, loved, forgiven, and I even see a purpose in the path I had taken. I realize I wasn't actually out of his plan at all- I realize he was with me.

The message I want to bring to you today is that no matter what you have done, no matter how prayerless you may be, no matter how few times you've read your Bible, no matter how many times you've stumbled- please trust a guy who is so naturally self-condemning that when you come to God in Christ Jesus you will find that he loves you more than you love yourself. He will welcome you. He will turn your chaos and back-slidings into purpose and fellowship with him. He will turn your mess into a testimony. You will be surprised that it is his PLEASURE to take you back. Come to him today!

Let's GO together God!

30 Day Test - Day #5

2011-05-18T07:37:00.001-05:00

What is this? An experiment. I am so busy and my time with the Lord was lacking. This is a test of spending time with the Lord faithfully for 30 days - as a test that by putting him first in my life and prioritizing time with him... he will help with the rest. I will blog daily during this test.

This is the fifth day of my "Put God First Test" and I've enjoyed the focus this has brought to the topic of seeking God. Its also forging new habits in me of getting to sleep so that I can wake up early enough to do this. For me, it is taking an exercise of faith to shut down my work laptop by 11pm each night- when I have 2-3 projects piling up at work that need to get done. My work is definitely getting a priority amount of my time but for a few weeks prior to this test I was working until 12am, 1am, and even 4am every other night in order to make progress on key projects. As a result- my time with God was lacking. The test is essentially this: "What if I put God first in my day and spent time with him? What if I went to sleep at a decent hour and stopped working on all of the things screaming for my attention? What if I did this because I trusted God that he could- and would- more than make up the difference and bless me? This is exactly like the whole philosophy behind tithing- and its like tithing my time. (read Micah chapter 3 and think of your time for a moment instead of just your money alone)

Lord, again I'm a bit tired this morning. I ask you to meet me here. Lord, you know I have a high visibility project that was due Monday I have not started on yet. I trust you Lord to help me with the things I cannot get to because I honor you with my time in prayer and your Word. I trust that as I follow the instruction in Psalm 37 to "Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart"- that you will help me with my work, family, Web project, online ministry, and my walk with you. Help others to read this and take the challenge- to dare to STOP in the active hope and belief that you can arrange our time, circumstances, and to-do items far more effectively than we can- if we will only make you the center.

To my readers: I have learned to say things about what God will do in faith at times when I feel nothing. I've learned to state things that I have no physical evidence of because I trust God that it will be so. I've learned to encourage myself in the Lord by reason and by the Word that he will do the right thing. I've learned to trust in his active, involved, and faithful action by prayer and waiting. I've learned to talk of God's rescue, help, or involvement because of who he is - even when it goes against the natural order of things - or my own sight of how things are. I've learned to use my mind to make a choice to trust God patiently when others are in upheaval or distress about circumstances. I believe this is the normal Christian life. As I read the Word of God people like David in the Psalm talk of God's rescue when he is at rock-bottom. I believe we go into any situation and we declare into the face of doubt, peril, or circumstances - that God is with us and that we trust him to help us. Pray, then wait- I can even see where a person would pray, then praise although I've pulled off waiting more than praising to this point. So, I want to apply this concept of trust God before it happens to this test. Its clear that some of my projects at work are getting done slower than they should because I am not working into the wee hours but going to bed so I can wake up and pray. I will use my reason here and say the following:
* Its early in this test
* I will trust him now so I will not be ashamed later by a worried or panicked reaction
* My faith will honor him- I will trust him before I see the evidence which means I honor the person he is
* I see him who is invisible with my reason and judgement
* He has been very faithful to answer prayers before
* He has blessed and helped my wife and I through many "bad economies" and blessed and helped our jobs
* I have seen his active work in helping others
* I can easily think of 3-4 scriptures that tell me to put God first, seek him first, delight in him, and he'll bless
* Its too important to my lifetime to have the habit of spending time with him to not start now
* This really puts my human nature on the cross to allow my spiritual life to govern my natural life in this way
* Lord, as I have said before-- I will proclaim that if a roaring "freight train" of circumstances is speeding down the tracks right at me to run me down...because you are with me it can do its worst and the damage will happen to the train and not to me.

Bible Passage:
Psalm 50 - this is what spoke to me in my Psalm of the day:
Ok, I went right from talking about trusting in God and putting him first even when you can't see any help yet into my Psalm of the day, Psalm 50, and I have to admit I had a bit of a shock at how much the Lord was speaking to the concerns- and my choice of trusting God just above..there were a couple of tears. Here are a few highlights of what spoke to me although nearly the entire passage was pointedly speaking:

2 Out of Zion, the perfection of beauty,
God will shine forth.
3 Our God shall come, and shall not keep silent;
A fire shall devour before Him,
And it shall be very tempestuous all around Him.
4 He shall call to the heavens from above,
And to the earth, that He may judge His people:
5 “Gather My saints together to Me,
Those who have made a covenant with Me by sacrifice.”
6 Let the heavens declare His righteousness,
For God Himself is Judge.
-----

14 Offer to God thanksgiving,
And pay your vows to the Most High.
15 Call upon Me in the day of trouble;
I will deliver you, and you shall glorify Me.”
-----

22 “Now consider this, you who forget God,
Lest I tear you in pieces,
And there be none to deliver:
23 Whoever offers praise glorifies Me;
And to him who orders his conduct aright
I will show the salvation of God.”(NKJV)
Wow, so obviously there were some strong words in there but it speaks of the active power of God, the speaking of God, the involvement of God, and it speaks of trusting in God- making a sacrifice and a commitment (uses the word vow), and how God will come through. Many amazing promises there applying quite directly to my comments above. Lord, thank you so much for ordering my life to have Psalm 50 be on this day- that is truly your work- and a confirmation.

That's all for today - gotta run to get ready for work. Praise you Lord!

Let's GO God!

Scriptures obtained from Bible Gateway. NKJV of the Bible is Copyrighted by Thomas Nelson.

30 Day Test - Day #4

2011-05-17T07:32:00.002-05:00

30 Day Test - Day #3

2011-05-16T07:26:00.003-05:00

30 Day Test - Day #2

2011-05-15T18:24:00.001-05:00

30 Day Test - Day #1

2011-05-14T14:19:00.001-05:00

The 30 Day Experiment

2011-05-14T13:22:00.001-05:00

My life is so busy, and I know the lives of many people are also. Right now I am juggling a busy family, an all-consuming job (I love it but still-- its all-consuming), struggling to find time for a Web project I have, trying to squeeze in a little ministry time, and yes... among all of that trying to find time to spend with God.

The spending time with God aspect is the part I feel the worst about. I have barely been able to squeeze any time in for the Lord even though for my job in the past 3 weeks I have worked after the family goes to bed until 1am or later in the morning about 5 times. So, I am prioritizing all of my time on my job and family, I don't have time for my Web projects at all, and my time with the Lord has been gradually slipping.

So I had to ask myself today- who is my greatest desire? Well my time investment says my job is my greatest desire- its really uncomfortable to say that because I can't imagine it being true but the fact is- my job is on the throne of my heart right now. I have an idol controlling my life.

I was speaking with another Director at my company yesterday and she said "this place will consume you- it'll become your life". It was startling because what she said wasn't spiritual at all - but the Lord brought my attention to what she said and I realized this had happened to me.

I want to make a difference at this company- I refuse to come in and just punch a clock. I refuse to allow process deficiencies, system enhancements, and sales improvements to sit there with no one working on them. If I have to spend my life working at a job - then darn it I want to make improvements- I want to make a difference. So, that is the passion behind my idolatry- it really has positive roots to it but I have let it dominate things.

Why did I let my job become a dominant force in my life? Well, you see the Lord is quiet and meek. Yes, he's all-powerful but he won't force himself on people- even his own kids. He woos us slowly, he teaches us, he is patient, and he is gentle- that's great but it means that a loud and urgent job and life with many problems, time sensitive issues, to-do items, deadlines, quotas, and loud/needy people can sometimes appear more real and relevant than someone who is quiet, invisible, and forgiving.

The slipping was slow at first - its not like you set out to grow cold in your walk. Its not like you even stop talking to the Lord- however the priority of spending time with him slowly takes a back-burner.

I have to look in the mirror today - do I want to be close to God? Do I want to make a difference at work only- or do I want God to be my center and trust that he will work together with me at work to make a difference?

Tithing is the concept of giving 10% of our income to God and trusting that if we do that he will bless the rest and protect us. God was so firm on the blessing and protection he would provide if people tithed that in Micah chapter 3 he literally said "test me in this and see if I do not pour out blessings so great you cannot contain them" (that's the idea not a direct quote). My family already tithes - but what if I tested him in spending time with him first and every day without fail? What if I tested him that if I delight myself in him like it says in Psalm 37 - he will give me the desires of my heart? What if I tested him in the verse where it says "Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness and all these things will be added to you"?

I am going to start an experiment today. I am going to keep it simple. Spend time in prayer and the Bible with God each morning and at least read a chapter in the Bible before I go to bed also- simple. Do this daily for 30 days to give it some time. For those 30 days I will blog on this blog my time with the Lord and any observations or results from this test.

Stay tuned for my first time with the Lord, blogged publicly, and stay tuned for the next 30 days for my experiment. Let's see what God will do --- and feel free to start your own experiment!

Re-committing to the common

2011-02-27T15:40:00.000-06:00

I have had an online ministry since Thanksgiving 2006 on this site and at Christianbusinessguy.com. I started out not knowing what I was doing. There was much to learn about "doing a blog", blogger itself, online ministry, etc. It was challenging, new, difficult, and rewarding. I advertise with Google Adwords across the Google display network so my ads show up on places like Myspace etc. I actually advertise my testimony site christianbusinessguy.com and I have that site linked to this blog. My testimony has a lot to do with God's grace, forgiveness, coming back from back-sliding, freedom from immorality, etc.

I get a small but steady number of inquiries, prayer requests, and some cries for help. My life has been so busy working in the business world, launching a Web venture in my "spare" time, and raising a family that for more than a year I have been terrible about responding to ministry emails. However, I don't think it was just being busy that caused me to respond slowly- or sometimes not at all. I think there has drifted into my heart a coldness to this ministry. I like writing, I really do but for various reasons- some of them even valid, I think my ministry sites have become too-familiar and too "common" to me. I still enjoyed this ministry but time, busyness, a lack of being able to see if I am making a difference, and a general hardness of heart caused me to treat this ministry as a common thing- and neglect it.

Through some messages at church www.gatewaypeople.com (watch the last 3 messages online and you can have God speak to you and recharge you too) and the work of the Holy Spirit stirring my heart I have realized that God uses little things, small things, inglorious things like this site. I have realized that I cannot see what he is doing in me and through me and this site. I am slowly recommitting my heart back to this online ministry.

My original vision was to advertise in places across the Web- kind of like an online missionary. I realized quickly that my ads were hitting people on blogs and websites all over the place and I saw how God could take his Word and his Spirit --- his HOPE right into the living rooms of people who need him.

If you could read the emails I have received over the years you would see how many hurting and hopeless people there are out there. Sin and the pains of life are shredding people. The Internet is a place people live and work- Jesus is into reaching people in common places, through common little blogs like this, and through common little people like me.

I'm recommitting myself to the common. May God in his grace reach people through these sites.

Strategies that WON'T work to stop you from sinning

2011-02-20T15:56:00.010-06:00

For men the greatest temptation of the flesh is sexual immorality- name your version of it if you want. This temptation is one that works on several levels against men. I'll first speak to this and then I'll get into some freedom strategies that don't work.

Why do we care as Christian men that we live a pure life and not sin- particularly in this area? First, the sin we yield to becomes our master- and we its slave. You may have noticed that when you fall in this area its very easy to get into a habit of falling.

Another reason we avoid sin is it cuts off our fellowship with the Lord. If you have a Christian life but aren't in the process of really knowing the Lord, walking with him, loving him, and hearing his voice this one may not register with you as much. However, let me assure you that there is a life way beyond just "getting saved". Your decision to repent and believe in Jesus starts a marvelous life of adventure, discovery, and even a spiritual romance that will give meaning to your pain, permanence to your forgiveness, and grace that will last. If you aren't living this life-- ask the Lord to show you how and start spending time in prayer and the Bible daily.

To keep this article short I will only list one more reason we want to avoid, particularly, sexual sin as Christian men. The fact is your spiritual confidence and authority to represent Christ in your daily life is annihilated when you sin. Your own thoughts and guilt- along with your spiritual enemy will question your "worthiness" to share your faith, encourage someone spiritually, offer to pray with someone, etc. It is immediate and automatic that (at least you believe and feel) you lose your spiritual authority when you sin sexually.

I want to acknowledge that there are other sins that work against men as well. From my own experience I have found that fear, jealousy, gossip, and back-stabbing are very good at assaulting a Christian man- and taking him down. I am just saying sexual sin is the worst, the most damaging, and the most authority-stealing sin for a man. (my opinion)

I will now discuss why sexual sin works on so many levels against men. Some of this is from my own personal experience and will not be flattering to me. It won't be too bad because I am too full of pride and fearful to share anything beneath medium depth...

Flattery. What? Yes, the "love language" and key of a man's heart is actually not sex it is respect. As men we have to be careful because a mere smile from a woman at work or in an airport can, if we let ourselves think about it, become a snare. What I have written about here is just innocent stuff so far- a woman can smile or pass a compliment because she is a nice person. As men we must steel ourselves while also yielding our thoughts and feelings to the Holy Spirit.

It can get worse than just a smile in innocence. Women who are actually targeting a man can use flattery, revealing clothing, hints that can be taken two ways, and other things-- unfortunately this can be effective in flattering a man. We must be like Joseph and run away from even subtle advances- we must distance ourselves. It is also very helpful to find at least one Christian man whom you trust as a shield-bearer and confidant. I nominated a Christian family man friend of mine into this role and for the past 3 years or so I have called him not just as a friend- but two or three times with urgent prayer situations in this general area of temptation. Once I sent him an email during a very direct attack of the enemy. I can honestly tell you that I felt it when he started praying for me- it was a huge help. We do NOT, in our pride gentlemen, have to do this all on our own. I hope you can see how much I wrote on flattery- and I hope you will take even that as a warning. Proverbs says "guard your heart"-- with the help of the Holy Spirit who is in you... we can do just that. How noble it is to be a pure man for our family. How much honor we walk in when we have a choice to sin- and run away even while our flesh is screaming and our soul is feeding on the respect and attention. How mighty and strong we are when we are pure and walking in the power of the Holy Spirit.

Images. This one is obvious because men are visual. It is no accident women were created in a different, unique way men are attracted to. God intended to create a marriage between one man and one woman and he made them fit physically, visually, and emotionally. Men are naturally attracted to women. I was at a life group a few years ago and we had a session in which we went around the room and shared about temptations, strategies, etc. I shared at that time that I am careful to not look at women. I divert my eyes a lot etc and speak to them as directly in their eyes as I can manage. I shared this and one guy said women were "God's creation" etc and it was ok to look, he kind of mocked me. He fundamentally disagreed with my strategy. Another guy didn't outright oppose me but he described how he would often have "30 second affairs" with women. He would smile at them and the ones that would smile back at him would give him a charge, a validation. I've often wondered how the life of the first guy turned out. I do know a strong Christian friend right out of high school ended up in deep backsliding and sexual sin and almost shipwrecked his faith - he had said women were "God's creation" too. I did find out, sadly, that the guy who had the 30 second affairs lost his wife a couple of years later and he's devastated. In the Bible the famous man of God Job said he made a covenant with his eyes not to look at a young girl. David said he would set before his eyes no vile thing. It would do us well to follow their advice. I found in my own experience when looking at pornography that it was progressive- I would get sort of bored with basic stuff and have to move into deeper areas. In addition, I ended up seeking out some of that in real life. You can start looking at a swimsuit edition, end up in "newsworthy" pornography, and end up deeper and deeper. The interesting thing about sin, in this case sexual sin, is that it blocks guilt- I am actually more sad and ashamed about the pornography in my past now than when I was doing it. The closer I came to sin- the less guilty I became. The further I am away from those sins- the more sin memories hurt me- but I'll take the hurt for the freedom. God heals hurts. So, when we engage in pornography or other sexual sin we deaden ourselves so that we must look at worst kinds of it to get a charge out of it. Later, we end up seeking it out and all the while we burn and scar our conscience so we feel less and less guilty. Engaging in this sin seems attractive and exciting but it eventually deals shame and destruction. Pornography has an effect similar to drinking an addictive poison that makes you feel less like you are dying- the more it kills you.

Images. One of the best things I did to get free in the area of sexual sin was to stop allowing my eyes to see things that were provocative -cold turkey. Television was nearly eliminated, during racy commercials I would close my eyes, no late night television, no suggestive non-Christian music, careful on movies, careful on highway billboards, and careful in the check-out line at the grocery store. One of the most direct mental programming changes I made was to stop looking at women who were not my wife. In our image and sex-driven culture we are surrounded by opportunities to feed our fire source as men. We must stop using our eyes for cheap gratification and ask the Lord to control our eyes. God has given us the power to forget- it took a couple of years for the images to stop swirling but they eventually did. (if you are tormented by these images/thoughts - you can email me and I will tell you how to deal with these, I learned the hard way)

Physical need. I am not going to get into this one deeply but guys do have a physical need in this area. Unfortunately we often wake up this hunger before marriage so we burn and don't have our God-given relationship as our natural solution. Paul said it is better to marry than burn with passion- excellent advice. I was in these areas of sin right up until the time I got married. When I decided to get married it was to a Christian woman and I made the commitment that she would be my ONLY source for fulfilling this need. This was hard at first but became easier.(that said I was tempted just this week in this area so we have to maintain vigilance with HIS help). Last thing- when we are in sexual sin, we often "ramp up" our fire source to the point that most women would never meet the need. Have the mindset to ramp yourself down a bit, reduce your appetite, allow your fire to be reduced to more normal levels. This takes time-- ask the Lord for help in prayer.

Here are some sin strategies that do not work against sexual sin and I imagine they wouldn't work well against gossip or envy either.

Using your guilt to keep you from sinning. We often get militant based on the guilt of sin we have just committed but I have found we have a short memory and this does not work long. Its a human tactic and it doesn't work well against a spiritual problem with strong links to our need for respect, masculinity, and a real physical need. Its all well to say "I'll never do that again" when your need isn't there for awhile. It won't last forever.

Using your fear to keep you from sinning. Sometimes we're so afraid of sin that, for awhile, it might stop us from sinning. This is also not a good long-term solution.

Using your success to keep you from sinning. Having a period of time you have success is good but, by itself, it is not enough for traction alone to give you future success. We need deeper solutions dealing with root problems.

Some good strategies. Guys, the cure for me, not to say I have already been perfected, but what seems to have been successful in my freedom these past 12 years when I was so deeply in sin was the following:

* Make a commitment to live for God

* Eliminate image sources that are counter-productive or pornographic.

* Stop looking at women.

* Your wife is your only source- period.

* Do not allow yourself to get into unforgiveness and resentment against your wife, do not allow the sun to go down while you are still angry. Be forgiving- and ask forgiveness. A good relationship with your wife is spiritually powerful and will protect you. The Bible says our prayers are actually hindered by not treating our wives well.

* Spend time with the Lord in prayer, Bible reading, and attending a vibrant and teaching church. Have a firm and passionate desire to seek the Lord throughout life.

* Get rid of idols- is there something that has your heart other than God?

Deep therapy from the Lord is required to set free - and heal:
* The cure-all is the Holy Spirit, changing our hearts working within us etc. Try to have a regular time of personal worship, singing, and praise to God. Ask the Holy Spirit to lead this time. I believe it is the power and grace flowing from a love relationship with the Lord which is the most powerful weapon of personal transformation and freedom in this area.
* Sit in a private time 1-to-1 with the Holy Spirit. Ask him to unveil to you the lies leading you to sin in the first place. Have your Bible open and ask him to show you what led you to sin- what are the lies you are believing? When he reveals these confess these as lies and as sins- ask him what the truth is that you didn't know before. Ask the Lord to heal you and set you free from each one as you encounter them. Really ask him to walk with you through each area of the bondage.

I believe that, ultimately, passionate love pursuit of the Lord- not just being content with "being saved" is the lasting and life-transforming way of overcoming sin.

We seek God because we love him- the more we seek him- the more we love him. Later we realize we are free and we can't really say when it happened or how it happened.

Its going to be ok

2010-12-08T23:49:00.000-06:00

This is a word for some of you: please do not be surprised, dismayed, shocked, or discouraged by the fact that you are going through a time of pain. Be encouraged that this is part of the process he is taking you through and it is not purposeless or out of control. Its ok to go through this pain. Just trust. Its normal to go through seasons like this- work is being done you cannot see.

Trust the Lord and do not be afraid or discouraged. Its going to be ok.

Pray, write your thoughts and questions down for the Lord, and leave them with God.

Enjoy God's presence

2010-10-10T22:37:00.002-05:00

A voice from the fire

2010-10-06T09:12:00.001-05:00

Maybe, if I really say, "let your will be done in me and through me", and if I really mean it then when difficult things come its really ok. Maybe living surrendered means I am not in charge- but maybe it also means I don't need to worry. Maybe if things seem out of control.. they're not.

How could they have known

2010-10-04T00:07:00.002-05:00

I hope you read the last blog entry, the poem by the unknown author about how God shapes a man for his destiny in God. This post is unintentionally (by me) meshed together with the last one like 2 gears mesh together to move energy through a machine.

I have been through a major disappointment recently, or call it a delay if you like. I had anticipated something and worked toward it for a long time and when it came it was not what I thought- nowhere near what I had hoped. I felt led in this thing by God, I invested a lot into it, and I worked hard at it. I sought counsel, invested resources, and always tried to put God first. I frequently felt the help of the Lord and there were clear sources of help all along the way- and yet this great and huge sense of failure and disappointment..

I've been staying true to the Lord through these feelings. I've been lightly tempted with anger toward God but have brushed it off - God is too good and wise to have done something wrong here. Had I missed God then? I don't see how I could have- no I didn't. Is it a timing issue- I hardly even understand that question.

The Lord asked me last week "How important is this to you". I told him honestly it was important but in the great scheme of what my life could be about or in the light of eternity- its not that important. He said, "Its important to me". I did not expect that answer..

And yet here I am in the same situation, holding the disappointment, and pushing to persevere against the odds- and against my own rebellious feelings of doubt and lack of self-confidence. I died and grew old through this "failure". I have little strength left in me - little heart left. I am tired.

I am blogging kind of from the hip here.. but I am going somewhere. My point was to show the problem first. The problem is that I was too weak to accomplish even what I did accomplish on my own. I have the largest deficit of self-confidence of probably anyone you've ever met. Its totally amazing that this business failure I've been speaking about (its not out of business by the way, it just hasn't gone very well at the beginning) is even in existence at this point and got off the ground. God has been within me throughout, I know that. I just can't reconcile the fact that he was with me- with what I see around me right now. I see failure with my human eyes- totally unexpected failure and yet I felt led, no I even feel led up to this moment. How does that work?

Ok, here's the lesson section and its a lesson for me too.

As I meditate about all of these I am referencing Biblical examples of men of God in the Bible who went through disappointment and crushing failure- but then later it was seen this was God's plan and he did make them a success but he did it in a character forming way:

- Moses was raised in royalty but in one day he was thrust out of his royalty and any dreams he had of palace life and leadership were destroyed. When we see him 40 years later in the wilderness raising sheep his self-confidence is so destroyed that he tells God to please choose someone else and he says he's not a good speaker. But God took this castoff man and called down plagues on Egypt and parted the Red Sea. How could Moses in his destroyed life among the sheep know that he was still called by God? How could he know God still had a plan for his life. Even more- how could Moses know that God needed him to actually go through all of this to turn him into the instrument he needed to use to free Israel? Moses could not have known- he had to suffer in ignorance and hopelessness for God's work in his life to be effective.

- Daniel was a man of God in Jerusalem, a young man off noble birth. His beloved city was completely destroyed and he was taken away captive to a land far away. He lived as a slave but God looked after him and after this tragedy of death, failure, humiliation, and slavery - after this failure God raised him up and made him a top advisor to several kings in a row. And all the while God spoke to Daniel about the future of the world. How could Daniel have known when he saw the dead bodies in the streets of Jerusalem that God had a plan for his life? How could Daniel have known when he probably became a Eunuch that God was still going to use him? How could Daniel have known God would use him to share the knowledge of God with foreign kings and foreign lands? Daniel could not have known. Daniel had to just suffer as a slave and keep himself pure in his pain. Daniel couldn't have known God was going to exalt him and make him a success- and use his life. Daniel was forced to interpret the dreams of others to save his life and the life of his friends- but he couldn't interpret the circumstances of his own life. He had to suffer and just keep his life of prayer intact and learn to listen to God. Daniel couldn't have known his life of shame and slavery would lead to royal position. God had to put him through that to make him the instrument he would become.

- Joseph, saw dreams about his future in his youth and told his mocking brothers. Joseph was nearly murdered, thrown in a well instead, and then sold as a slave. His father was so distraught when he heard his son was dead that he almost died- and he would never be comforted. Joseph became a slave, worked hard, and then in the act of keeping himself pure - he was accused of being violently impure. He was falsely accused of hurting is boss- in the very act of protecting his boss. He was thrown into prison for years due to this. Just when he had some position and authority by being the head of a rich person's house he was thrown into a gloomy dungeon. Where were those vivid dreams he had back at home? Here he was alone, humiliated, lied about, and worse than a slave- a prisoner. How could this injustice be happening? He stayed faithful to God and 2 people needed dreams interpreted. He interpreted those dreams correctly and KNEW this help he clearly had received from God would be his ticket out of prison. He was forgotten for 2 more years and stuck in jail. His freedom was forgotten, his dreams were dead- even he didn't believe in them anymore. If you asked him how important they were he would say "they're not that important to me anymore, I'm not sure I believe them". But God would say "they're important to me". Here again God raised this man directly out of prison dramatically into leadership, success, and the fulfillment of his dream. How could Joseph have known that he didn't miss God in those dreams- he couldn't have known. How could Joseph have known that in the midst of his suffering he was exactly in the center of God's will. Joseph was alone, he had no one to spiritually encourage him, God was his only comfort and fellowship. He had no one to validate himself with - he learned to depend on the invisible. He learned to trust God and chose to continue with God right in the middle of what could have been interpreted as God not helping him. How could Joseph have seen his own future - he couldn't have. God had to do those things to him to use him in a great and mighty way in the future.

- David - sitting with his father's sheep, the youngest and most despised of his brothers. No one knew or appreciated the fact that he had slain both a lion and a bear in his loyalty to his father and to his sheep. God had helped him do that. God helped him to see that with His help he can fight something greater than himself - even as a young boy. Samuel came to their house because God said the future king was in that house. When they finally brought David in, last, to see Samuel God told Samuel young David was the one. Samuel anointed David king --- it took years upon years before that came true in actuality. In fact even after great victories like slaying the giant Goliath David was nearly pinned to the wall by the spear of the current king, Saul and run out of town to live in caves for yet years and years more. David lived like a fugitive in the deserts, wilderness, and caves - constantly on the look out to save his life from the jealous and bloodthirsty king Saul. David's life was unfair. His life was terrible. He was poor and lived in fear for his life. Thieves and murderers became his companions. Was this the life God had for him? How could he have known when Samuel anointed him King it would be many, many, many years before the reality would be seen? How could David know his friends, innocent priests, would be killed because of him? How could David know that his failure, humiliation, and abandonment were not the end? How could David know this backside of the desert experience was in the center of the road leading to God's mighty plan for his life? He couldn't have known- he just had to bear it. Was he going to blaspheme God and walk away because he had spent so much time trying to serve Israel - only to be chased by Israelites and by the King? His choice was to learn to worship in the wilderness. His choice was to learn to be penitent in prayer. His choice was to learn to be patient in affliction. His choice was to learn to spend his abandonment learning the Law of God, the Word of God. How was David to know that the anointing of Samuel was not a mistake, a misunderstanding? How was David to know he didn't miss God- he couldn't know. All David could do was choose to leave God or stay with God- and if he stayed with God it meant accepting the facts of his situation and trusting God without being able to see what was going on. How could David know he was in the center of God's plan - even though he was in the center of suffering. He couldn't have known.

I don't think I can know either. I don't think you can know. I think all we can do is suffer and make that choice- will we stay with God through this? And not just stay with God but will we not become bitter but allow God to give us peace in the midst of it. Will we seek God even more? We say God led us here. Did he lead us to leave us?

I don't think we can know in the midst of our pain, humiliation, failure, and disappointment what God is doing. I think suffering may just be part of the plan. This knowledge helps me almost not at all but I somehow begin to believe its true about me.

The pattern with these men seems to be suffering, delay, and disappointment, and a long period of time prior to God's will for their life coming to the place of fruitfulness. The pattern seems to be that death precedes life sometimes in God's plans.

I am going to act like its true and try to be patient. I am going to seek the Lord believing in his goodness and wait for him to lead me. I say I serve him. I say I follow him. He's God - I just have to trust him, I know he is good and wise. I will seek him fervently and with great determination because whatever happens with the business my commitment is that I will know Christ.

When God wants to...

2010-10-02T00:17:00.000-05:00

When God wants to drill a man, and thrill a man and skill a man,
When God wants to mold a man to play the noblest part,
When He yearns with all His heart to create so great and bold a man
That all the world should be amazed,
Watch His methods, watch His ways,
How He ruthlessly perfects whom He royally elects;
How He hammers him and hurts him,
And with mighty blows converts him into shapes and forms of clay
Which only God can understand,
While man's tortured heart is crying and he lifts beseeching hands;
Yet God bends but never breaks when man's good He undertakes;
How He uses whom He chooses,
And with mighty power infuses him,
With every act induces him to try His splendor out,
God knows what He's about.

Author Unknown
(I heard this on an RZIM.org podcast from Ravi Zacharias)

My Business meeting with God

2010-09-27T23:00:00.000-05:00

Probably almost a year ago I was having, every Monday during my lunch time, a short "Business meeting with God". This was a time in which I would sit quietly with the Lord, dedicate my business to him, go over various things going on in the business, ask questions, and see what his priorities were.

I stopped doing this some time ago and last week I re-instituted this practice at lunch time. It was neat to re-start this practice. I love traditions and I sense at times that God loves them as well -especially if it means time with his children. Well its our fiscal year-end at work and I have plenty of personal business things going on as well.. However, in spite of the craziness today I decided to spend a short prayer time at lunch. I got into a quiet place in the car having forgotten it was Monday-- business meeting day.. As I was about to start a brief quiet time my attention was suddenly and startlingly arrested as I remembered, "Oh no, this is Monday I almost forgot- our business meeting day".

I shifted and moved right into business meeting mode but I was haunted by the staggering thought.. the Lord was waiting for me. HE REMINDED ME.. He actually looked forward to the time and got my attention to not let the meeting be missed. I am so awesomely moved and floored by this realization and so torn apart inside that God desires me like this. I remember that verse in James that says his "Spirit longs jealously"..

I don't want to distract you with the list of 5-6 things that were resolved and sales that came in during my lunch time so I won't(though they were STUNNING). I would give them ALL up for the knowledge of this personal love of God- this love that is so passionate for us that he waits for us. Oh God help me not to make you wait for me.. Please don't let me make you wait for me.

We were never meant to be apart

2010-09-25T13:14:00.001-05:00

I remember when I left my last job after 10 years. It was so hard. I had a dinner for everyone who could come and I probably had 20 people show up. I gave a quick thank-you farewell talk and was able to talk about Faith in God for a minute as well. It was an evening of fellowship and warmth I will continue to remember. I felt the need to say goodbye.

Before, during, and after the dinner and for weeks afterward I experienced strong internal waves of overwhelming emotions I cannot describe. Wave after wave of these pangs of loss swept through me and I could literally feel something like angry butterflies in my stomach- my own internal man objected to this! I had worked with some of these people for 10 years and many of them at least 4 years. We shared memories of challenges, fights, losses, and victories together. I had spent 8 hours a day with these people for years and years and now I had to go.

We promised each other we would keep in touch, we exchanged information, and we laughed and told each other all of our inside jokes again to somehow provide a break in the moment.

I felt, and it seemed others felt, this change in a very tangible but silent way. It still amazes me how physical the loss felt- it wasn't even a bad loss like someone had died, I was just leaving the company.

The fact that something happening in the natural world like me leaving my company had an actual, physical pain associated with it seemed like my inner-man knew something I didn't know consciously. The pain I felt physically matched the pain I knew mentally and emotionally as one unified roaring objection that something was wrong. I could reason that people always leave companies, people leave High School, people leave College, people go off to join the Army, people retire, and people leave home to be married. All of these things are normal and happen every day. Why then was I so overcome with this feeling of loss? Pain is associated with a warning of damage in the physical world. How is it then that my soul or my spirit within me was able to push through the world of invisible things through the physical blood and fiber of my human body to make me feel this way?

What did my inner man see or know that I did not about me leaving my company? What does my inner man know when someone dies - even when I understand that if they know Jesus Christ they are going to heaven. Why do I feel these feelings of grief when I part from someone? Why do we all- the feeling of loss and grief is as likely to happen as the fact that we'll lose people.

I wonder if my spirit, created by God, and in the image of God knows that we were never meant to be apart. I wonder if, in our relationships, we weave unseen cords of fellowship and relationship together by our proximity, our time, and our communication with one another. I wonder if it was God's original design, a design our spirits are patterned after, that we should never be apart. I wonder if we're meant to be eternally together. I wonder if that death God spoke of, brought by sin, has a horror it creates of relational separation that our God never intended and that only our eternal spirits when they are ripped away from one another can know. I wonder if we mentally miss, in all of our sophistication, the fact that we are eternal beings inside of ourselves, meant to dwell in warm proximity to one another in the bonds of love. If we have to part from one another, if someone dies, if we divorce, we internally tear apart limbs and fibers that were woven together as naturally as the vines of grapes weave together.

When the Bible said God hates sin and he hates death, I wonder if its because sin and death violently and eternally separate us from one another and from God. Our sins harm one another with internal damage against the very fibers that were supposed to bind us together with cords of love. Our sins tear us away from God and leave a wound that was never intended to be.

I think our souls and spirits inside know something so sad and tragic that we'll never understand. I think the only way our inner-man can express the pain of this broken plan, this broken pattern is with the waves of grief and loss that we feel so deeply we don't realize it. I think the pain we feel is from damage- and I think we were never meant to be apart.

My journal entry June 8th 2007

2010-09-18T20:52:00.000-05:00

Sometimes its a good thing to sit down for awhile and re-visit what the Lord has taught you or spoken to you in the past. I did that tonight by reading my journal.

Here was a particular journal entry I ran into this evening that blessed me. June 8th 2007:

"I work hard and stumble often, make mistakes, and trust the Lord all the
way while praying for help and somehow it seems my life is a long, constant string or series of failures that eventually lead to success in spite of how things look in the middle stages. This is the miracle of ...my life"

I feel awful.. she cried

2010-08-15T20:49:00.002-05:00

Here is why I feel awful. My wife has been waaaay stressed out in the past hmmm few months (all of Summer I guess). Its about all she can do to just keep her job, the house, and the kids squared away- I totally understand that. I have been working my tail off on business stuff, helping a lot around the house, helping with the kids, trying to balance everything, and just frankly we've not connected well for awhile. So, with all of that insanity going on for both of us (and listen... she really is my best friend) somehow we got into it on Tuesday and in her moment of frustration and need she texted me something that nailed 2 sensitive spots for me as she was putting the girls to sleep (I think I texted her something first that stirred her up, whatever its not worth the time to go check my cell phone). It led to a pretty rough evening that night but then I tried to make it right and it ended up ok. One of the things I said at the end of it is I loved her, she needed to trust God because she was stressing too much, and that marriage is rough sometimes- that's how it is for everyone.(and I really meant all that stuff)

Well, for me... its been a hard week at work, I have too much going on, I am multi-tasking too much and staying up late working. She's been preparing all week to take the girls to the beach for a few days, they left today. So, here's my challenge... those 2 sensitive spots she nailed with that text... kept bothering me all week. I prayed all week, but the harder I worked, the more tired I got, the more she had to focus on trip and job - the less we talked and the more I thought about what she said.(can you feel a stew cooking up?) I got madder and madder. I was totally raging inside, thinking mean thoughts, and barely able to hold back from showing it.

I KNOW its mean, I couldn't help it but I felt like I was walking around with 2 spears in my chest from what she said and they hurt more every day. (if I told you what they were 1 of them wouldn't surprise you and the other one you wouldn't think it should hurt that much, don't be nosy!)

Anyway, I was not able to contain my anger anymore and Friday night I started to talk about things. She then "shared" which escalated it more. I hated it. At the end of it all I made her cry which is of course the ultimate horrible feeling.

That's not what I wanted, I was just dealing with my internal pain- in fact several times during the fight I de-escalated things, I REALLY tried. I can't figure out why after all of my prayer for God to help me to forgive her for the text message I kept boiling. I can't figure out why I was allowed to give the fullest vent I've ever given to my wife in an argument (no language or name-calling, we both kind of tried to keep it civil, don't let your imagination run too far with this it wasn't movie-worthy or anything). I mean I prayed most of my 35 minutes home from work for God to help me, to give me grace, to help me to just love her through the pain, and here I was like an emotional bull in a China shop...

So, that is why I feel awful. I actually had this in my drafts guys Saturday because honestly its too embarrassing, too sad, and too shameful. I verbally stressed my wife out so much in an argument that I made her feel very insecure about things and made her cry. I don't know, maybe if I share this with someone it will help someone, someday.

Here's the thing, when she cried I knew that was not what I was going for- what I wanted was a deeply sincere apology about what she had texted me. I wanted to be free of those demons that tormented me all week about how precisely her words had cut me. So, why did God allow this level of marital shaking and an argument I am so humiliated to have been a part of (I am tearing up right now as I type this)?

I always tell everyone that when you pray the action is started in heaven- you just can't see it, feel it, or understand it- but whether you know it or not things start to happen behind the scenes-- because God is faithful. Could it be that God allowed us to go through that terrible conflict? (I am not sure where to take the rest of this blog post) Could it be that God is (as Ravi Zacharias says) the "Grand Weaver" who takes the cords and fabric of our lives and weaves them into the tapestry that he has planned?

We reconciled that same evening and worked through it. We're going to talk about some of the core issues when she gets back from the beach, probably through a date night. I just told her we have GOT to schedule time together, there is nothing I like more than talking with my wife. Its like I am recharging when we have time together- the trouble is we haven't had any. So, I just think we have to figure it out and plan that time together even though as busy as we are that seems impossible. We need to plan for connection, and plan for marriage success.

There is an early outcome within me that has taken place as a result of that fight, God may have more in store for us but I can see one helpful outcome from this vantage point. Basically, I saw my wife in a very vulnerable moment, a sad moment, a distraught moment, and I never want to see her that way again. What I want is to be her defender, her best friend, her supporter, and her forever. I am so broken about this but I feel like I just have to surround her in life, protect her, and be there for her. Life-stresses and exhaustion were a big part of why she ended up crying, essentially I was the (large) straw that broke the camel's back. I have a new vision for (I am pausing because I don't know if I can post this, this is too vulnerable) life and marriage and I want to be her safe place.

Sorry if I disappointed anyone, I know I'm awful, but since we both put God first in our lives I trust that he had a purpose for us in that time even though it was so sad..

Today seemed like a failure

2010-08-08T00:43:00.000-05:00

I have traces of a feeling that I was failure today and I hate that feeling. My wife gave me several hours to do some critical business work and in spite of good, focused effort I just did not accomplish enough. The stressful thing is my Mon-Fri work week is generally so busy that to have part of a Saturday to accomplish important business things is hugely valuable. I had one of those days today and not-enough got done.

So, today seemed generally like a failure. Men are so tied to our work and to achievement through work and I am no different. In an effort to accomplish more some men work, whether on occasion or regularly, 7-days a week. I think that is a mistake for the Christian man.

God himself set an example of working 6-days, then resting a day. One of the Ten Commandments says to not work one day every week. And later, Jesus said this one day off a week principal was made for us.

Taking a day to rest when you have much more to do and shutting work down when its screaming loudly at you for more attention takes a real commitment. For example it was hard for me to stop working 20 minutes ago when I could have gone another 3 hours easily but its late and I need rest and tomorrow is Sunday which is the day I go to church, shut off work, and spend time with my wife and kids.

So, if I fail today I choose to trust God that he'll make it work out for me as I trust him with my day of rest tomorrow.

G'nite folks

That day

2010-08-04T18:47:00.002-05:00

I cannot wait until that day in which I look through eyes without motives.

Dead things are not dead

2010-08-02T19:46:00.000-05:00

Guys, I'm sorry that many of my posts seem to come from trials, its true that this is what seems to happen. The fact is that as I seek the Lord I DO still go through many trials. I will actually blog soon about that in greater detail but not today. This one is very short.

Ok, I had such a great weekend with the kids, so memorable. I'll tell you what my children are like sparkling jewels I carry around my neck (it seems like there is a Bible verse that even says something like that, well if so that is so true). I really set aside work a bit to spend time with them this weekend and it made a difference, I credit my wife for calling out the need of this to me.

Well today at work it was back-to-back six hours of meetings, work through lunch and I am planning to be here until 8:40. Yep, working hard and honestly I am absolutely drowning. This level of working will barely keep me afloat.

I took a brief break for dinner and in the car I was just telling the Lord how I just have no hope at all in myself or my circumstances to get better because so many of them are just out of my control. I had this idea pop into my mind or heart that said, "can you trust me to bring victory out of death", that was roughly it. I just told the Lord "yes Lord".

So, I am going to press on, stay positive, keep being an example and keep trying to make a difference because the Lord is truly with me -- and with him dead things are not dead.

I will work hard Lord and await your victory. Help me make a difference. If you ever wanted to know what value is there to serving God in business or in the marketplace? He just took a discouraged guy and told him to look past those things that he perceives and hope for- and work for something better. I think that is pretty valuable indeed.

Retreat

2010-07-30T19:45:00.001-05:00

Exhausted, too much to do, pressures from without and within. In the middle of the fight, exhausted, I am going to take a spiritual break for a few hours and sit close to my Father. This defies my own brain, I should be working late into the night, but no - I will rest with my Father for a little while and if I fail in my endeavors, I fail.

Free... but guarded

2010-07-25T15:51:00.244-05:00

Freedom from... well let's just say the so-called "typical" guy sins.. has been consistent for me for about 11+ years now. With the compulsive personality I have this is amazing. I do realize talking about this sets me up as a target but guys need to know its possible with Jesus Christ.

I would love to write a "how to get free article for guys"...but gentlemen I don't really have the full answer on why I am free other than to say I know it was the work of God in my life led by the Holy Spirit. I CAN say that I am not the only one friends- the world says 99% of guys do it - but that is a lie, many many are free and walking in power and authority even after falling hard.

The purpose of this article is to throw down some thoughts on how my journey started and give some info on my ongoing battle in this area. I'll cover some available weapons against this as well. Some of this may get embarrassing. (to my wife: fair warning to close the laptop)

I wanted to get free from all of my impurity and immorality as I was about to get married. When I wanted to get free I realized I had stacked the deck against myself. I was looking at every female that moved(completely bound and addicted to this, so embarrassing and it was total idolatry), I had habits of failure, I was looking at a ton of "STUFF" online, and not too long before this time I was acting out a LOT of it...(yah, with me its all-or-nothing in one direction or the other) My mind was saturated with images of sin and my expectations about this "area" of life were too far out there due to the way I had programmed myself and what I had seen. I pictured this area of life as too air-brushed, too wild, too willing, too frequent, and too unfair for any long-term relationship with a woman. And frankly my body was revved up in high gear by creating a fulfillment frequency that had me totally on fire- my need was out of control. Getting married was supposed to "solve it" but that wasn't the full answer. It ended up that I brought a lot of baggage to my marriage to an innocent newlywed wife...

I realize only now that I was revved up, juiced up, psyched-up, set-up, and filled-up with a lot of sin- and I'm not going to say I didn't like the stuff either. When I quit, it was merely a calculated decision.

I stopped feeding myself just before I was married with all of these inputs mostly cold-turkey perhaps with a few "less-bad"(I am mocking that in case you didn't know that) habits straggling for a year or so. I tried to cut off the obvious big items before I got married because my vision of life was that if I was going to be married I wanted to be a man of God. Frankly I missed God, I have always loved, appreciated, and had affection for God even if I was away from him. I was surprised that when I turned to God during this time that my mind was a mess and so were my expectations of this area of life. It turned out to be a journey- and a journey involving a lot of battles (sometimes even with my wife).

I was committed to progress, I kept trying. I would look at someone, then repent. I would have a minute-long immoral fantasy and when I came to myself I felt horrible, dirty, and tainted but would repent and not give up on God's work. I would linger on a late night movie for 30 seconds when I shouldn't have and then feel terrible, but I would repent. I just wouldn't give up. My wife and I absolutely committed ourselves to going to church and I began to spend time with the Lord in the Bible and prayer- this was inconsistent but I kept trying. I kept failing, and trying, failing, and trying, and then trying some more- in all areas.

I realized I had to have a constant and militant mindset. Some of the choices I began to make would seem over-the-top even to my wife. I would not look at a shampoo commercial that was suggestive, I threw away my secular music, and stopped going to Rated-R movies. I was really trying to guard my eyes and mind. I also made the firm decision that my wife was to be my total source in the fulfillment department. This was hard because "drive and timing" can vary a lot between guys and gals but I still chose to live within the confines of my marriage. (Note: guys if you have your drive revved up by too much frequency this can change and normalize, not saying the battle ever goes away but this helps)

A lot of motives helped drive the purity effort- at first it was just the dream of being pure. I believed that the images in my brain would fade, given time, and they did (this took YEARS). Later, I wanted to be pure with the desire to not hurt my wife. Now, years later as I've really become close to the Lord and walk with him daily I realize that if I took the path of immorality after having been free for so many years I would not only be betraying my wife but I would be choosing to not have fellowship with the Lord. I would have to turn around and walk into the darkness without the Lord if I chose sin. I don't want to do that and I pray he keeps me close because it's always been my dream to be very close to God, my #1 goal. I always push myself to seek the Lord and keep asking him "what else can I do to be closer to you" and "help me to have an undivided heart". So, IN SPITE of the fact that I still walk around breathing the poisonous fumes of this sinful planet-- I am holding my breath and hoping I die to the world. I know this effort will cost me a lot..

I always guard my heart and live with a high-level of awareness of what may capture my desires and my will. I am so paranoid that something will take my affections off of my Father that I use my mind and my ability to make decisions and choices to take authority over what my sometimes wild or lustful heart may want. In addition to this I also pray for strength and grace if my heart is betraying. Pray, then wait - help is coming. This could be an entirely separate article but you have to understand that when you pray God HAS answered, the wheels are turning just wait for his help and know you have it. I pray quite frequently if I see someone in a public setting who is dressed inappropriately (this happened today). I can't help it if my nature responds to my environment in the way of a man but what I do is radically divert my eyes and I do not look no matter what. Then, if I'm particularly weak or if this person is going to be around for awhile or whatever I pray about it in my heart. Let me tell you something I MAY BURN ALIVE BUT I AM NOT GOING TO FREAKING LOOK AT THAT GIRL- just shoot me in the head because I am not going out like that.

Guys - wake up you are warriors.. be militant warriors for God and ask for his power stop rolling over like a bunch of slobbering babies and be MEN of God.

Ok, back to my story.. I knew I had to continue to be radical in my reforms - as radical as the brave men who fought like lions at the Alamo because they were surrounded and had no choice. I had NO choice and was surrounded by total impurity - and acceptance of impurity in the world around me. In fact I was "weird" at times, I don't care. I was weird but now I'm free. I was weird but I have a great marriage. I was weird but now I am led by the Spirit. I was weird but I have a relationship with the Father.

Be weird and join me. Be willing to stand alone- and you'll never be alone again.

One last thing before I get into some tactics and stuff. Guys, I have had times in the presence of God that were so powerful that I've asked him to stop time. I have had the Lord tell me things before they happened. When I read my Bible it speaks to me almost every day. When I pray, things happen. When I minister to someone I KNOW the Lord is going to give me something to say to them. And most of all, I love the Lord and I know he loves me. I know I am forgiven, I know I am free, even if I fell I know to run back to God. Gentlemen, this life is difficult for us but it is worth it for the glory of God in our lives and the relationship you can have with him. The world needs you, the Kingdom of God needs you, but most of all God wants to walk with you hand-in-hand, you are his little son and he wants to walk in business with you and in life with you. Will YOU make the radical choice to be pure? Will you cut off the evil influences? Will you commit to him in prayer right now?

Ok, I want to cover a few tools and concepts:

As guys one of our enemies is our chemicals in our own blood- which is tough.. Some of those chemicals that make us strong and aggressive guys are also what keeps our internal flames burning(you guys are smart enough for me to not have to spell it out) So, we've got an internal flame that is always burning and there are times I can feel actual burning inside.

Another flame that we have inside, and I haven't heard almost anyone talk about this but its the affect of flattery on a guy by a woman. Guys, I have had 3 instances in the past 30 days of this and its worse than any other attack (for me at least). Happily married and fulfilled though I may be I am still vulnerable to the attack of flattery. Somehow even a vague and indirect flattery or show of interest by a female is still something I have to contend with. I live a very guarded lifestyle and I don't even have private conversations with women so I can have success in this area but I've become aware of this issue lately. I think the issue was always there but the enemy has been attacking me stronger and in new ways lately. I think the enemy uses different scouts against us and probes different areas to see if he can get a foothold. I can see how men fall whether it just be to online stuff or real-world stuff, I get it. I have setup for myself an accountability partner to help with situations like this. I emailed him a couple of weeks ago when one of these unsolicited female flattery situations came to me and I asked him to pray for me. I am telling you I felt something leave me about 40 minutes later. I called him later to thank him.

I have surveyed 3-4 other guys recently and apparently its not just the typical visual stuff that gets a lot of us but its this (imagined or real) perception that we may be wanted - that is very poignant and flattering to a lot of us (not sure if its all of us but I am so far 100% in asking guys I know.) Be aware of this tactic and seek your praise, worth, and strength from God. If our wives more deeply understood the direct access that praise, respect, and being wanted in this way has to our desire and to our will they would be shocked. Guys, from my experience our women really don't understand this issue so you need to love them exactly like they are and learn to sit in God's presence and let him fill this need in your soul - seek him and he will do it, then go love your wife graciously and without placing this burden to worship the ground you walk on onto her.

So, be aware of this flattery attack and deflect it by making the decision to not respond in any way to this. Walk away, or shut off the Internet and delete the message, or whatever is happening (2 of my 3 were Facebook friend requests that were illicit- but flattering and unsolicited people I didn't know). It can come in different forms but run away just like Joseph in the Bible. Also, pray that God protects your imaginations, your desires, your will, and your memory. Finally, do what I did and find a guy who is mature in the Lord enough that you can trust him with this information and someone who can pray.

Hey, this stuff doesn't mean you're weak, weird, or a womanizer - this stuff oftentimes actually seeks us out and preys on our weak areas. However, if you're aware of this and have a pure and God-seeking lifestyle you will defeat it. You can definitely live a free life.

There are things that fuel this fire.. awareness of them is a tactic itself. First, as guys our eyes seem to have direct access to our fire source. If I look at a pretty girl it fuels the fire a little bit, even if it's an accident. I made the firm and radical choice to not look at women at all if I have any choice in the matter- if I have no choice then it's above the neck only and only as long as necessary.

Part of my enemy is also within my own will- after 11+ years the desire to look is still there and sometimes it's like ripping my eyes away to not look. I admit however having a pre-made policy at least means I have a plan and can form some habits-- however it's still a choice against my own nature and will at times. I always use prayer-in-the-moment to support me in my weakness. (guys, why are you fighting this without prayer?)

The Word says "the weapons of our warfare are not carnal (human-based) but they are mighty through God for the tearing down of strongholds". The Word also says we have "weapons of righteousness in the right hand and in the left". These are the words of warriors and it shows there is supernatural help and many weapons the Lord will give us in our fight - HE is the source. I like what 1st Peter 2 says - it says as we come to him we are built up into a holy house, a holy priesthood. It doesn't say we build ourselves into a house- it says we come to him and HE builds us into something holy. Again, this is more spiritual than effort-based although there is effort- but you need to get in the habit of coming to him continually in this fight. He will build you and form you.

Are you willing to turn to the Lord fully in the area of your masculine nature? Are you willing to stop filling your mind with everything that fuels your fire? Are you willing to stop looking at women? Are you willing to stop trying to get the attention of women? Are you willing to run away from all forms of female flattery and attention? Are you willing to purify every area of your life? Are you willing to commit yourself to your wife 100% as your source even though she will not understand this fight?

If you are willing to fight this battle - don't do it just to be pure. Do it for a dream. Do it for the dream that you can walk with God. The Bible says that Enoch walked with God and then was no more, imagine that - he was so close to God that God just took him away to himself. If you are willing to lay down your life just know that it will be hard, you will have to die, sometimes you may scream in prayer- I did, you will have to forgive your wife for not understanding your struggle, you will have to be willing to stand alone when the other guys are going the opposite way. (I watched them walk down the path of this world and I heard stories of broken lives from some of them later) If you will take up your cross and follow Christ just know that you have the Father standing by to help you. You don't need me to lay out every weapon and tactic that you will ever need. You need fellowship with the Lord. You need to develop a life of the Word and Worship and get close to God- be patient with this process. Do this for 1 reason only - that you want to be closer to God than anyone else on the face of the earth. Do it because you want to lose yourself in him.

Prepare to die.

You will never imagine the life that awaits.

Rise man of God and grasp the strength of your Father's hand.

Ships, Oceans, Remembering

2010-07-17T13:30:00.001-05:00

O' Lord are you pleased when I am beaten but I trust in you through it? Are you pleased when people abandon me but I cling to you? I feel something noble and right when I trust you in the darkness- when I fight even when I am blind. I feel you must be pleased when the reason I don't give in is because I reason with my mind that you are good and you are faithful.

I DO trust in you, it is my choice to do this. This is my life's lesson- my One Prayer. May the Lord ever help me to trust in him no matter what Hell, the World, or the circumstances of life may hurl at me. As I walk through the landmines of life I hold your invisible hand- as they explode with all the noise and fury that reality can bring I still my soul before you by my choice. You are with me Lord, even when I cannot see, feel, or hear you. You are my righteousness, my buckler, and my everlasting shield.

Praise God who has always looked after this little ship, this foolish man, this feeble vessel on an ocean so vast and dark and deep.

I want to tell you a story about remembering.. There is something beautiful about remembering the works of God in our lives and reciting them to him one by one in order. Telling God the story of his work and grace in my life is one of the richest forms of communion I have found with the Lord. I like to sit with the Lord alone and walk, in my mind, through a season of my life and remember before him everything I was facing- and everything he did.

One such season involved the sea, not literally, but you will understand in a moment. In 2005 I was leading a sales team handling new business for a large startup venture in the networking industry. In that year the company had outsourced our huge renewals business to a California company. Throughout that year this company struggled greatly- sales were not as expected and forecasts were missed. 2 Vice Presidents within our company were directly or indirectly fired over this. This failure was known throughout our company.

In December 2005 I was asked, with few options, to take over this struggling business. My family had months before scheduled a vacation for a week during January 2006 - the very month I was supposed to take over this business. In addition our company decided to use January 2006 to roll out a huge new CRM system for our sales teams. Needless to say my family vacation week was memorable - for its stress.. Unfortunately I was caving in to the pressure at this time, calling in to the office multiple times during the day and fretting greatly about my new sales team, new sales role, our new CRM system, and the horrible timing of my vacation. Its so sad that although I do remember the time with my kids, the memories of stress are the ones that are the clearest.

We went on family vacation with 2 other family groups and we shared a rented vacation home. There was no place to pray and have devotional time with the Lord. The only private place I could find was the master bedroom's garden tub. So, I ended up taking a lot of baths that week. I would spend time with the Lord in the tub after we got back from a day of activities and sometimes fall asleep waking up in the middle of the night in the tub, craziness.

My fears of poor vacation timing and not being there for the CRM rollout were not my worst fears. My worst fear was taking over an incredibly large sales responsibility when I got back from vacation which had failed so badly the prior year that executives had been fired. This area of sales was new to me and it involved skills and experience I had never acquired- and I was supposed to basically figure it out.

Every day in my bath tub devotion time I poured out my fears to God. I cried out to God for help. I was so naturally unsure of myself and this new assignment was just overwhelming. My VP had told me "you'll just WILL IT into being", he didn't understand how things work for me, he didn't understand how much I have to rely on the Lord. The fear stayed with me like I was possessed, like it was a spiritual toxin inside of my cells- and I had no relief. No one could comfort me, I have never known how empty words of encouragement can really be up to this time. No one could make me feel better. Everyone's words could not change the huge darkness I was about to have to walk through all by myself. I was alone and I was in charge of this.

It all came to a head one morning, in the bathtub again, when I prayed in anguish and with an imagined situation in my mind. I said, "O' Lord, I am like a little child at the wheel of a huge sailing vessel trying to steer it in the blackness of the night in a huge storm at sea. I don't know how to steer this vessel but I am at the wheel. I can barely stand up with the waves crashing over the sides on to the deck. I am clinging to this wheel trying to steer it but this ship and this black storm are overwhelming!" Suddenly, in my mind a shining figure tall and strong appeared in my imagination as I was praying and explaining this analogy in prayer to the Lord. Bright and tall this figure's arms were over my shoulders with his hands over my hands on the wheel. I will never forget that dark sea, that wooden ship steering wheel as tall as me, I'll never forget the fear I felt, and I will never forget that he showed himself to be my Captain, the captain of my little ship, of my soul.

Those memories have echoed throughout my life since that year, the year the Lord became my captain, the year he showed me how to walk forward in my fear no matter how I felt. The time he taught me to make him my trust, my hope, my light, and my Captain.

That year we crushed sales expectations, setup new processes, and moved into a place of excellence. We faced many troubles, trials, set backs, and yes- fears that year but we prevailed. My VP at the sales kickoff the next year said "I knew it, I knew you could do it". I have always tried to explain to him the Lord's work in my life and I hope I have planted seeds with him that will eventually sprout to the salvation of his soul through Jesus Christ. I hope this friend of mine will one day find that Jesus wants to be his Captain too.

Jesus thank you for being my Captain.. I take the time to remember you.

Lesson: 2 Believe

2010-06-20T22:03:00.001-05:00

Short and sweet the #2 lesson of having a devotional life is to make the decision to keep going no matter what. If you fall short, get busy and miss a day or two- recommit and keep going. Do it joyfully and without feeling shame, fear, or rejection. Your Heavenly Father isn't thinking negative thoughts toward you if you miss out on a devotional!!

We pray, read the Bible, and worship him because we want more of him. The beautiful secret is that you WILL get more of him and your love and desire will increase for him the more you spend time with him.(man am I preaching to ME tonight)

Come to him in prayer honestly- he knows it all anyway so tell him if you sinned, ask him to help you and forgive you. Ask him questions you have. Ask him for help with life's issues and problems. Pay attention and you will notice the questions you asked and the requests you asked are being answered -often in very natural ways. (sometimes I wish God would answer with a flashing sword but he usually uses very normal ways to answer our prayers)

Lesson 2 - Believe and keep going, trusting in his plan and his love.

Watch the internal conversation

2010-06-19T11:45:00.000-05:00

Ok, another blog post today because I am being lazy and am not going to go edit the last one. I was taking the trash out, getting the mail, doing the (insert evening chores here) stuff I do about 4 nights ago I guess. I was thinking something to myself like "it never ends, my life is so crazy, there is too much to do, I'm a martyr blah, blah, blah" (man I hate writing that stuff down)

Well, as I was walking to the mailbox, I can remember where I was, and I was thinking all of these exhausted, frustrated, and despondent thoughts to myself the Lord suddenly broke into my thoughts and said "watch the internal conversation". Shocked, I realized I had this stream of thoughts flowing through my mind like a bubbling brook of frustration and I was totally believing and buying-in to those thoughts. I wasn't filtering and my thoughts were directing my mind into this negative, unthankful, untrusting, and really exaggerated direction. The Lord woke me up to this and I realized I have a choice of what I think about, what I believe about my circumstances, and the contents of my internal conversation.

The enemy would love to have me down in a ditch buying into this negative stream of thought and emotion. But Romans 8 talks about having our thoughts controlled or led by the Holy Spirit. It also talks about the mind of sinful man being death- its right because there was nothing life breathing about the thoughts I was having.

I need to submit to the Lord in my thoughts, beliefs, and watch the internal conversation.

--
(side note- shout out to that big, loud, God-lovin' African American dude in that Dave Ramsey-lookin' suburban who I gave a thumbs-up to in Grapevine an hour ago when I saw his license plate said "God 1". Way to represent man-- I love your God reflection, much respect)

Its always the struggle

2010-06-19T11:33:00.000-05:00

I have some really important work to do right now for the next few hours- time is limited. Life is such a balancing act. I have decided this week to work harder to carve out time 1:1 for the kids so I am taking them someplace fun tonight. Also, I have had no devotional time today and I've learned over the past 12 years that daily time with God is the #1 secret to growing in the Lord, defeating temptation, and trusting in him instead of worrying.

I am going to at least spend a few minutes in the Word to feed on him. Lord, help me balance family+you with work. I love you, lets go Lord I trust that you are with me even if my time is limited today.

"The best time to trust God is when its hard"...

2010-06-12T21:25:00.003-05:00

Thursday evening June 3rd I was driving home and listening to the Bible on my iPod. I was in Psalms as the narrator read, "He sent His word and healed them, and delivered them from their destructions." (Ps 107:20) I remember hearing that verse right as I was getting close to the house. I was about to turn on our street when my wife Jamie called and asked me where I was. I told her I was essentially home and asked her why? She said, "Maddie (my 8.5 yr old daughter) has fallen hard in dress rehearsal and can't walk. I need you to come here right away because I can't carry her." Worried, I headed to the dance studio.

Maddie fell hard and awkwardly doing a dance move at her dress rehearsal for the Lifesong Dance Studio annual recital which is a very big deal. Lifesong rents and fills the local L.D. Bell High School performing arts center for 2 nights in a row. All of their Dance Companies, their performance group, and all of their dance classes of every kind perform their dances. A lot of money in costumes are spent by each family and many, many hours of practice are spent by dancers and their teachers. There are some dancers that probably spend more than 100 hours in a season training, practicing, learning, and performing - and it all leads up to recital night. Maddie lives and breathes her dance. She always loves to dance at home and loves dance practice. She is in Petite Dance Company this year and has done super. When Maddie fell we rushed her to the Baylor Grapevine Regional Medical Center because she could not walk. They x-rayed her foot and said it was broken- a "dancer's break" they called it. They said she could absolutely not dance at the recital on Tuesday. When the doctor told Maddie this she shrieked so loud it freaked all of us out. She screamed and screamed and said, "no, no" and would not believe it. It was the worst possible thing that could have happened to her from her perspective and she had never experienced grief and loss so suddenly, dramatically, and with so much finality.

Earlier when we were getting settled into our ER room a nurse came in that Jamie and I recognized. 3 years ago when Jamie had some pretty serious issues going on this nurse had been the one who took care of us in the ER. So, I greeted nurse "Jenny" when she came in and said she had been the one who had helped us 3 years ago. I told her what a difference she had made to us and how she even shared some spiritual insights with us that helped. She was really glad to hear that even though she didn't remember us personally.

Well, when Maddie was shrieking "no, no" in disbelief and shock at her terrible news nurse "Nurse Jenny" heard the shrieking down the hall, knew about our situation, stopped what she was doing and prayed. "Lord, please, please give me something to say to this little girl to help her." The Lord said, "well what have I told you". She then remembered Jeremiah 29:11 that says, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." She printed this out and came in to see my daughter. She told her the Lord had a word for her and shared with her how she had prayed and the Lord had given her this verse. Maddie calmed down somewhat at the presence of nurse Jenny though she was still in grief and shock.

We left the hospital in a wheelchair and with a big black leg boot and crutches- totally shocked and numb with grief for our daughter and our family. I kept trying to comfort Maddie with the verse nurse Jenny gave her and I kept trying to comfort myself with the verse on healing I had heard just moments before my wife called me with the news- I thought maybe, just maybe the Lord had been warning us - and had given us something to help us trust him.

My Facebook status 9:37am the next morning - Brian Howard Prayer requested: Our daughter has been practicing for a dance recital for maybe 9 months and she is in a competitive dance company as well. Last night at dress rehearsal for a Tues-Wed major recital she fell and broke her ankle. She will miss this recital and is totally devastated. Also, she has nationals in 3 wks which seems very at risk now too.

Jamie was walking around numb and in such grief for Maddie all day that she just didn't know what to say. We have a saying in our family, "The best time to trust God is when its hard." Jamie just kept repeating this to herself and hanging on to it throughout the day. Sometimes I guess we just have to make the mental decision to trust God even though everything around us - and even our own emotions and fears are against us. The next morning she took Maddie to the orthopedic surgeon for more x-rays, expert analysis, and a treatment plan.

My Facebook status 3:08pm - Brian Howard MADDIE'S LEG IS NOT BROKEN NOW!! Sports surgeon says she has a double-sprain. Maddie can do a couple of her dances on Tuesday. This is a miracle!!!! Thanks for ya'lls support and prayers! God is good!

Maddie kept her foot wrapped, elevated, and iced Fri, Sat, and Sun and by Monday she was able to dance in the final dress rehearsal - 7 dances. The surgeon saw her on Monday and said she was experiencing a miracle... we knew it and agreed. He released her from care at that time as well. She went on to dance her 7 dances again in the performance on Tues and Wed. I also got to do our daddy-daughter dance together on Tues and Wed which was one of the biggest highlights for me. It meant even more because of the gratitude I felt not just for the time and the memory with Maddie but because the Lord truly helped her- and our whole family.

I have been unable to fully express my thanks to the Lord on this. I really don't know how to do it. Every time I think about it I am lost for words. I know he can do anything but I don't know why he would choose to bless and help this family and our little girl with such a healing and blessing. He restored something that meant so much to our daughter and to our entire family and it is such a legacy for us from the Lord. This will be such a remembrance and praise for our family to the Lord for a long time. I really hope I never forget this and I hope my daughter lives in a state of thankfulness and faithfulness to the Lord due to this kindness he has done toward us.

Lord, may our Lifesong truly sing to you..

Not hard work alone

2010-05-05T22:02:00.001-05:00

I can no longer rely on hard work alone as the answer to business progress and success. Hard work isn't taking me far enough or fast enough. There aren't enough hours in the day for hard work alone to be the ultimate difference-maker. In addition there are people, processes, policies, and technologies that are part of the solution that is needed and hard work cannot always affect those by itself.

I need a comprehensive solution - One that is all powerful, wise, patient, and compassionate.

I need a life of effective business balanced with graciousness in my personal life and love toward my family.

I feel the Lord urging me to work hard and not quit but to rely on him more- and delight myself in him by putting him first in my time.

This radical devotion will produce results in unexpected ways both in my business and in my character .. and I trust within my family.

I will work hard, but thinking that is my answer stops now if the Lord will help me.

Family Time... and Lesson #1: Start

2010-04-18T21:35:00.005-05:00

My family is trying to re-commit ourselves to having a weekly (we do it on Sunday evening) family time. We have a hard-bound prayer journal we've been keeping for about 2 years now (its fun to go read what was going on back then). My 2 kids, my wife, and myself each get to pick 2 things we are thankful for and 2 prayer requests. We write them in the book and then we pray.

We also have a Bible story and I typically stand-up and try to tell the story fairly dramatically and occasionally act out parts of the story and even involve the kids some weeks. We've been missing this time a lot so I asked my wife to help me to make sure we wrap up our busy Sunday stuff that is typically happening so we can have this time.

My purpose in having the family time is three-fold, these are not in order of importance:
1.) I want this to be a great time for us as a family to spend together and my theory is that this will bond us together and give us special memories. I remember when my dad and mom used to read to us and those are super neat memories- I hope this means as much to my own kids.
2.) I want to carve out this time as a family to have us all on the same page spiritually and to have us all carve out the time to put God first.
3.) I am pursuing the Lord and I want to plant seeds in my kids and in my wife that will spur them on in their journey of chasing God as well.

Tonight as I relayed the story of Josiah to the kids and to my wife I said. Kids, the problem for me is that I CAN'T choose God for you. The lesson for you is you have to be the one to do it. Each person has to make that choice for him or herself- their parents cannot do that for them. I told them I have had times with the Lord that were so powerful, rich, and awesome that I have asked him to not let the time end. I said to them that seeking and pursuing God is the most powerful and amazing thing there is- but it takes work and you have to stick to it and not quit.

I told them- So, if you are going to choose to seek the Lord and put him first how do you do that? I said, Tonight, I am going to tell you about the first lesson of seeking the Lord...and then I will do one each week.

So, I thought I would pass along to my friends here on the Web the first lesson I shared with them. The first lesson when you make the commitment to stop playing around and put God at the center of your life, your thoughts, your actions, your choices, and your ALL and you want to start seeking God - is to start.

That's right the first lesson is to start. Start seeking him, start spending time with him. It will be difficult, you won't know what to do, it will be dry, it may be dull, you may see no results early-on, you'll have to carve out the time, (you'll have to HEAVEN FORBID shut off the television) and you may want to quit but if you're serious you won't.

You must come to God so brazenly, so boldly, and with such determination that you will never quit once you start. There is nothing that could stand in your way. You will give up friends, family, fun, and even food sometimes to spend time with him. You will seek the Lord when you think nothing is happening and it is totally worthless.

You will do this because of a thing called "hope". Hope is waiting patiently out of trust. Hope is a belief that if you're faithful- surely God will show up eventually. Hope is desperation for God. Hope is dissatisfaction with living the sick, carnal, controlled, pied-piper lifestyle this world has for you. Hope is persevering in prayer and in reading your Bible believing God will eventually show up.

And if you do that, and if you don't stop... God will meet you.

James chapter 4 verse 7-10 says "Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Lament and mourn and weep! Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He will lift you up."

I like that verse that says "draw near to God and He will draw near to you".

Lesson 1: START.

Why do it?

2010-04-18T21:18:00.003-05:00

I was listening in my car today to my Audio Bible (Word of Promise Old Testament - which rocks) and I am in 2nd Kings right now, somewhere around the chapter 20/21 area. I was listening how Hezekiah was a very godly and zealous King of Judah. He was so close to God that when the Lord sent a prophet to tell him it was his time to die and Hezekiah cried to the Lord- the Lord extended his life 15 years!

However, somehow in spite of seeing this godly example all his life Hezekiah's son Manasseh was so wicked and brought so much sin into the land that the Lord made the decision to destroy the land of Judah and take the survivors into captivity (the Bible says he worshiped every idol imaginable, burned his own child to death, and filled the streets of Jerusalem with innocent blood). This is so shocking to me that you have a godly king followed by the worst and most cruel ever.

Next Ammon is King of Judah in the place of his father Manasseh and he is wicked. YET in spite of his grandfather and his father being incredibly wicked the next king- young Josiah follows God wholeheartedly. In fact, his heart is so committed to God that the Lord actually delays the promised destruction of the land of Judah until after the death of Josiah.

So, the pattern I see here is that no matter how bad your family life is its YOUR choice to serve God or not. No matter how bad the example you had in your parents and grandparents its still your choice.

And, the reverse is also true - we saw how even with godly examples we had the worst kings of all time.

So, each of us has a choice. Each of us cannot rely on our past, we cannot rely on our legacy, and we cannot make excuses if we come from a bad background.

We have to make a fresh choice, a commitment to a path, and choose God for ourselves - why do it? You have to decide that.

Attempt great things for God - and expect great things from God

2010-04-08T10:27:00.001-05:00

Actually do things in spite of fear, circumstances, opposition, lack of experience, and self-doubt. Do them BECAUSE they are hard -- and do it because you trust God. Do things defying the circumstance because compared to the awesomeness of the God you trust you totally DESPISE the odds-- you despise the opposition.

Work hard, be diligent, trust God- and attempt things trusting that God will help you.

Positive is Hard Work

2010-04-05T11:09:00.001-05:00

There are really 2 mindset choices we have in any situation whether it be sales, relationships, challenges, or life in general:
* The choice to be positive= keep trying and believe it will work
* The choice to give in to the negative= this is the no effort choice, anyone can be negative.

Work hard, keep trying creative solutions, and CHOOSE to be positive- it will affect your sales and life!

Remember

2010-03-31T08:53:00.001-05:00

Remember the old paths, the old commitments, stay close to the fire... don't cool off

Its Just Amazing

2010-03-23T10:34:00.003-05:00

I have been reading a chapter a day in Psalms for maybe 9 years now. I rarely miss a day if ever. I noticed a few years ago I would read the Psalm in the morning and sometimes it would speak to me in advance - exactly what I needed for the day. This happened as I stayed faithful to this daily practice. I actually read my Psalm of the day before I launch into the craziness of my day at work on Biblegateway.com. This phenomenon of my daily Psalm speaking into my day - in advance of when I need it has only gotten stronger, richer, and more meaningful over the years.

There are 3 big ideas around this I want to convey:

1.) The Psalms themselves are just powerful. David and the other writers of the Psalms went through all of the same pains, fears, tragedies, battles, and victories we go through. So, when they wrote these prayers, petitions, and praises under the direction of the Holy Spirit they really hit home with the things we deal with today. I have also found that by reading these so much it has affected my thinking in many positive ways such as: learning to wait for God, learning to trust in the Lord, learning to be bold in the Lord, learning that the darkness I sometimes have to walk through cannot make an end of me, etc.

2.) The practice of total commitment to this daily routine seems to be something the Lord has honored in my life. He has really begun to speak to me through these times and he has so ordered my steps and life that the scripture is relevant to my circumstances almost every day now.(the times I cannot see it is relevant to a particular struggle--- I am sure I needed it anyway)

3.) Today is a special example. I actually had to miss my official morning devotion but I asked the Lord for help in a few specific areas in the car on the way to work. Well, Psalm 144 was my Psalm of the day and it really addressed one of my in-car prayer items I had just prayed specifically about. The Psalm addressed my need so specifically I sort of gasped out-loud at my desk. I was so blessed the Lord had an unusually specific word for me on a day I missed my quiet time with him- but that is just how loving the Lord is.

So, I hope this helps. This is a great practice and the daily diligence of it is something the Lord really honors- and it'll help you grow.

Exhausted / No safety net

2010-02-23T22:22:00.005-06:00

I am exhausted. I am also dealing with a lot at work- notably some very disappointing decisions that hurt. Things have been very challenging of late. Also, it seems no matter how hard I work I'm rarely caught up with time to be proactive.

My answer in times like this is certainly always to work harder and to stick with it- that is always a fundamental answer for me and its really the "Howard way" starting with my own Dad. But I need more than that to feel ok about things from now on. I'm tired of just working harder and "sticking with it".

What I want to do is test the Lord in putting him first in the middle of it all. I want to radically put God first in my time and priorities even though it would seem impractical to an outsider. I want to do crazy things like when its stressful and slammed at work and I "shouldn't" leave my desk for lunch -- I want to go spend a half hour in my car praising the Lord. I don't mind booting up the work laptop at home at night but I want to be daring enough in my faith to shut it down to ACTUALLY play with my kids and (gasp) read my Bible before I go to bed. I want to do all of these "crazy" things while also working hard at work.(if you slack because you're "spiritual"..,you're not spiritual)

Matthew chapter 6 talks about seeking first his kingdom and all these things will be added unto us. The rest of the chapter talks about how people who don't follow God are always stressed out. Our jobs are our source of money and provisions and these people were running around in a flurry all the time seeking money, career, and meeting their needs. Jesus is saying in this passage to seek first his kingdom and his righteousness and all these things will be taken care of - and he follows that by saying don't worry.

Lord, help me to "DO" this scripture and not just read it. Help me to spend time with you when the circumstances say I shouldn't. Help me to play with my kids in the faith that you want me to be a good daddy and you'll bless me at work. Help me to work hard but not bow down to the idol of insane job-worship that wants to kill all of us and our families. Help me to live a no-safety-net kind of faith trusting in you.

Giving Honor and Holding Shields

2010-01-11T22:34:00.006-06:00

Its overdue- the time to say thanks. I like to say thanks. I like to honor those that I owe so much to; it feels good and its important. I feel like I've done something bigger than myself when I honor someone. On this blog you've seen a couple of examples of some honors I have given special people in my life- and I hope in my life I am able to spread more honor...

But right now its time to honor God. I really have a million reasons to honor God but I am going to focus on one. I just read my blog title from December 9th and was freshly reminded what a dark and challenging valley my sales teams, my family, and I just walked through. It was a very difficult sales quarter to say the least. I won't outline the specifics but suffice it to say I was worried for some very real reasons.

During this bleak sales time I knew I had to achieve a critical balancing act of relaying a confident message to corporate while building up the hope, self-belief, and focus of the sales reps. I had to accomplish this with little to no help from our situation. In fact the external evidence of our situation pointed to a possible "worst quarter ever" scenario. Balancing these heavy loads is more difficult when you are trying to maintain belief yourself. Sometimes it feels plastic and hollow to tell people to "keep going", "keep believing", "keep trying", "stay with it", and "keep believing in us", when all you have to give them are your words.

...That is except when you are in business with God. I learned a lot last quarter (sales quarter ending 12/31/09) about the God who "calls those things which are not as though they were". I kept up my morning devotional routine and kept God in the forefront and the first position in both my day and my life. Yet, my circumstances nearly suffocated me as I was giving everything I had and nothing was happening to improve our sales. I have limits, I've hit them before, and I pretty much hit a mental and emotional wall last quarter but the Lord each day would give me some verse or some thought that would inspire me.

In order to help the team's confidence and morale I would go over and have a 5-7 minute chat with them each morning. As I stayed with that each day I began to suspect the Lord was in some of the encouraging things I was relaying to them. After several days of it I was actually asking the Lord what the word of the day was for us. Each day I would have a story, a word, a phrase, a kudos, or something to say to them. There was one day I felt like the Lord was with me so strongly that as I relayed an inspiring message to the team my own eyes welled up- the Lord was with us. It was a hard way to learn the lesson but THIS my friends is working with God. It just about broke me down going through the quarter but I learned that God was with us, he was with me, and he could be trusted. It did not mean that we could sit around and sing a hymn and expect our sales to come in- it meant working harder and smarter than anybody and praying like crazy that God would do something. It meant me as a manager coming to work and opening my mouth to say something KNOWING God would give me something important and encouraging for my team- and myself.

One day I remember talking to the guys about conducting ourselves in the battle in a manner we would be proud of at the end- no matter the outcome. I said, "I will work hard, stay positive, stay supportive of you guys, and at the end of this I will not be ashamed of how I conducted myself in the midst of this battle." This ended up being true. By the Lord giving me the confidence in those meetings each day to encourage them with some word from him- no matter how bleak it felt during the sales day or at night I stayed behind the guys all the way. I was enabled to do this by the help of the Holy Spirit and by staying in his Word and allowing him to speak to me.

I was blessed one day because one of the guys told me in front of the group that my talk from the previous day really spoke to him and he thought about it alot that night; that was cool.

So, I want to praise God and give him the honor because he stayed with me all the way through that bleak and difficult quarter, he inspired me, he helped me to inspire the sales reps, he taught me a lot about going to battle with him, and much more. You notice I didn't tell you how the quarter ended up? Why? It doesn't matter because as (again) I told the guys one morning, "I think the outcome of us staying strong, staying together, supporting each other, working hard, and never giving up will have a positive influence on our character and our careers- no matter how this short-term measurement of the quarter turns out." I truly believed that- and I still do.

But OK.. I will tell you God did give us an external victory as well- in true God style.. In the last 8 business days of the quarter we pulled out a landslide victory. We wound up having the second highest number of deals in recent company history and we beat the previous year for the same quarter with less reps! So all praise to God for such a dramatic finish- and for the lessons we all learned.

A lot of people talk about the Biblical Letter to the Ephesians detailing the "armor of God". One of the key pieces of the armor listed there is the "shield of faith". I used to wonder about the shield of faith and just say "oh that means trust God". I certainly learned that lesson more richly this quarter. At points this quarter I had no more words, no more arguments, no more ideas, and no one could tell me anything that could help. I felt totally by myself. At that time I learned about this shield of faith in God- and how to use it, how to actually apply this passage in the Bible. I found out the way this shield works is .. you hang on and never let go.

Inspiring Faith & Football Story

2010-01-10T11:30:00.005-06:00

I generally write about faith and business and my personal walk with Christ but you NEED to check this out! Special thanks to my Facebook friend Joshua for sharing this.

http://rivals.yahoo.com/ncaa/football/news?slug=jn-texasreligion010610&prov=yhoo&type=lgns

A Problem of Luxury

2010-01-09T16:51:00.002-06:00

In my family we have a saying. The saying initiated as I was musing about the types of problems we often deal with. When you start comparing the lifestyle the majority of us in the U.S. are blessed with compared with the poverty, hunger, sickness, and strife experienced by the vast majority of people around the world the contrast is as stark as night and day.

What we often say when we experience something of a problem or setback is "well that's just a problem of luxury". For example the garage door is having problems right now but instead of complaining --- if I am in my right mind I must step back and say "how unbelievably blessed we are to have a house!" Or, if I spill something on my new shirt how humbled and almost embarrased I should be to be frustrated when I have 20 other shirts... this is just so sobering...

This perspective is something I think the Lord is teaching us as a family and the lesson is painful. When I see children in Africa without food and dying --what a blindness and horror it would be complain in our world of 3 meals a day. The restaurant service is slow and I have found myself irritated. The driver in front of me is slow and I complain. How blessed to have a meal how rich to have a personal vehicle?

I am speaking of my own heart's lesson- this is my transformation, not a sermon and no matter how much this lesson wounds me it's a lesson I pray God never stops teaching me.

If I let this thinking work on me and in me long enough I will have two unavoidable changes happen in me and my family: first, every trial and issue will be a reminder to stop and give thanks to God with a heart of amazement. And, it will confront us with multitudes of reminders every day of how we must not be selfish but we must allow God to share our bread with the hungry- and his bread, his Son Jesus Christ, with the world,

God forgive me for my selfish, blind-hearted, me-focused, and pitful ways.

Sales Musings

2010-01-06T14:03:00.001-06:00

I am thankful to be in sales- the constant pressure keeps me totally dependent upon God. I can't think of a refining fire, especially with my personality, that would do more good for me. Lord help me to lean on you- you're my business partner.